IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own idea.

#people #attention #idea
it is undeniable that advertising has effective actions to attract consumers like a double-edged sword. In my ,opinion I think
this
 idea is a strongly effective method, So I will discuss the agreement and the disagreement for
this
 situation. 
firstly
, research has found that most advertising companies study the behaviour of humans to provide their needs,
Also
 they keep showing their own products by posting them every were on the streets, on social media and on the radio attention.
Furthermore
, society feels more comfortable when companies know their essentials, So everyone doesn't have to deeply search for their own items.
However
, In these days residents all over the world depend on what advertising donate and what will provide in the future.
secondly
, Some consumers think that these methods are no longer attractive like in the past days, most posts only target a specific range of nations.
For example
, teenagers from 17 to 26 years old. These ages are the largest proportion in our present life and incomes are increasing day after day when they afford what they need.
For instance
, Dubai which is the richest country when it has become to business, keep targeting men and woman for fashion shows and brand store by attacking every single poster, website and sponsored location.
this
 makes the family feel upset and ignore the idea of advertising. So the enemy officer has been
juged
Correct your spelling
judged
 and
socity
Correct your spelling
society
 will stop seeking
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
 path and search for a new one. in conclusion, I highly agree that advertising is one of the most successful processes to catch the community's eyes, But there is one thing for certain we should not deny companies must focus on all types humen and share their products that are capable of all ages.
Submitted by khaleefalkhalaf on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: