At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
It is quite common
these day
that the rate of young Change the determiner
this day
these days
adults
is larger than the
Correct determiner usage
that
older
Change preposition
of older
people
. This
phenomenon shows us the unbalanced of age at
some Change preposition
in
countries
. However
, I think that the benefits of this
issue are better than the disadvantages.
There are several drawbacks that a relatively large number
of young adults
, compared with the number
of older people
is harmful. People
often have this
opinion because the unbalanced age issue is more and more critical. if the number
of young adults
people
too crowded, they will live with
Change preposition
apply
their
unhealthy lifestyle and they don't want to Change the word
an
heard
Change the verb
hear
their
parents or older Correct pronoun usage
what their
people
said
. One Wrong verb form
say
of
good illustration is Change preposition
apply
a
single mom and young mother phenomenon in Correct article usage
the
United
States, where Correct article usage
the United
has
58% population are young and Unnecessary verb
apply
adults
people
.They go to the bar, club too much, use wine, Correct word choice
and cigarette
cigarette
too early and the Fix the agreement mistake
cigarettes
finally
reason is they get pregnant too early. Change the adverb
final
According to
the report of National
Medical Organization in the USA, there are 23% Correct article usage
the National
young
women get pregnant because of negative entertainment Change preposition
of young
such
as bars, clubs, and pool parties,...
Although
the disadvantages and negative effects I had told you,
Change preposition
about, countries
countries
have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
larging
young Correct your spelling
large
adults
community also
have these potential benefits such
as the inspiration of them, ability
to work is greatly effective and the population can stable in the future. Young Correct article usage
the ability
people
always
active and Add a missing verb
are always
energentic
, so if they choose the right way, they will Correct your spelling
energetic
enthusiastic
Add a missing verb
be enthusiastic
with
their work, Change preposition
about
whereas
the ability to work, to
think, solve Fix the infinitive
apply
the
problem and Correct article usage
apply
developing
will more and more improving Wrong verb form
develop
everyday
. Replace the word
every day
However
, the countries
can more and more develop too. For instance
, Vietnam has a rate of young adults
people
is 49%, quite high to compare
with Change the verb form
compared
another
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
countries
in the world. From 2010 to now, Correct article usage
the goverment
goverment
innovate the curriculum and education, Correct your spelling
government
young
Correct word choice
and young
adults
people
can easily find their bullet ability, so the GDP of Vietnam increase
from 1000usd per person per year to 2300 Add a missing verb
has increase
usd
per person per year now.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
USD
although
there is
some problems with the population of some Change the verb form
are
countries
includes a relatively large number
of young adults
, compared with the number
of older people
. I tend to believe that there is
more advantages than harmful.Change the verb form
are
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