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Band 5

Watching TV shows and movies about crime is becoming more and more popular. Why is this? What effect does that have on society?

#tv #movies #crime #effect #society
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TV
programs
 which present storylines about criminals and atrocities are gaining more attention and interest from the public views. In
this
 essay, I mention the reason for
this
, which is mostly the psychological aspect of watching these genres of TV shows, in which
people
 tend to receive the excitement they need from them.
Furthermore
, I believe that these series have almost no negative impacts on society rather than being addicted to overwatching them. Television
programs
 that select atrocity as their main storyline have been appealing to the public since the beginning of the cinematic industry,
however
, they
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
starting
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 to gain more attention in recent years.
This
 is because as the public adapted to a sedentary lifestyle with monotonous office workplaces and no excitement, the urge
for having
Change preposition
to have
show examples
 an adrenaline rush is rising in society. These
crime
 shows are one of the many ways to do so thanks to their thrilling plots and action scenes, which give exhilarating feelings to their audience. Take
for example
 Breaking Bad, a Television series about an ordinary chemistry teacher, whose boring life and recently diagnosed cancer led him toward using his chemistry knowledge for cooking drugs. The storyline was appealing to the public and it reached success
as a consequence
 of coming up with a plot which normal
people
 can connect with.
Moreover
, the implications of these TV shows on society are mostly positive except for their attractiveness which can make
people
 addicted to them. Many
people
 contend that by following these violent pictures, individuals may pick up their violence or the ways of committing
crime
, albeit a recent study suggests that these types of
programs
 have minimal effect on ordinary
people
's tendency to commit
crime
.
Hence
, watching
crime
 shows do not have adverse effects on
people
 apart from their desire to waste time on them. In conclusion, Television shows and movies representing a protagonist with
crime
 desires are attracting more
people
due to
 their fascinating scripts and exhilarating senses which can compensate for individuals' lack of excitement. On top of that, these cinematic
programs
 almost have no adverse impact on the public except for them being somewhat addictive.
Submitted by sajadtorab on

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coherence and cohesion
Your essay provides a basic level of coherence and structure, but it lacks clear organization and development. The introduction and conclusion are present but need improvement in terms of clarity and relevance to the topic.
task achievement
Your essay partially addresses the task, but it lacks complete development and clear comprehensive ideas. Relevant specific examples are somewhat limited, and the overall response could be more focused on the given topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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