IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You have just returned from a holiday. You are unhappy with the quality of the hotel you stayed in and want to complain to the travel agency that arranged the holiday. Write a letter to the manager of the travel agency. In your letter, * say about the holiday and where you stayed * mention why you are unhappy about the hotel where you stayed * say what you would like the travel agency to do

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Dear Sir /Madam, I am writing
this
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 letter to complain about the terrible experience. We went through
while
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traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 with your company package. We got to know about you from an advertisement on Google. My family and I were amazed by the review on the internet of your services.
However
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, I received inferior treatment and met with bitter experience. We took your gold package for the Jaisalmer mini trip and stayed at the Marwar Hotel. It was promised by your agency that the hotel staff would come to pick up my family, but unfortunately, they didn’t do that. We waited there for 40 minutes to get our room keys
due to
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 their lack of management.
In addition
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, all the rooms we got were not clean enough and organized for
money
Correct article usage
the money
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 we paid for
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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. So eventually, I had to leave the hotel early in just two days to get rid of that foul smell.
This
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 is my humble request to you for a full refund as I was unfortunate to enjoy all your services. Looking forward to hearing from you soon regarding
this
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, Yours faithfully, Dhruvi

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coherence cohesion
Try to clearly separate the main ideas into distinct paragraphs. For instance, have one paragraph focusing solely on the specifics of the holiday and the hotel, another highlighting the issues encountered, and a final one detailing what you would like the agency to do.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contains a single main idea for better readability and coherence.
task achievement
You have effectively covered all the main points requested in the prompt, such as describing your holiday, explaining the problems, and stating what you would like the travel agency to do.
task achievement
Your tone is appropriate for a complaint letter - it is formal yet clear and polite.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are correctly done and fit the formal tone of this letter.
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