In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing their levels of habits health and fitness are decreasing cause and solution.

#countries #weight #people #levels #habits #health #fitness

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Presently, many people struggle with their uncontrolled weight gain because of their unhealthy lifestyle and physical laziness.

This

Linking Words

essay will argue that the main causes of

this

Linking Words

prevalence are stress and dense

schedule

Fix the agreement mistake

schedules

show examples

, and

then

Linking Words

will suggest we should practice good habits

Linking Words

Rephrase

apply

show examples

well as the localities should invest more in expanding recreational facilities in order to deal with

this

Linking Words

issue. First and foremost, overweight can be a result of depression.

This

Linking Words

is because when we tangle in mental issues, we might tend to overdose on junk food since snacking can stimulate the endorsement and comfort our nerves. Apart from

Correct pronoun usage

this

show examples

fast-paced

Correct article usage

a fast-paced

show examples

life is

also

Linking Words

a source of destructive habits. The reason is,

when

Correct word choice

that when

show examples

people are stuck in a rat race, their mind is occupied by their work priority, so they might turn out to neglect to take care of their health.

For instance

Linking Words

, many young in Vietnam have to simultaneously take in a nine-to-five job and join classes in the evening to pursue their master's degrees, leading to very little time to prepare meals and eat leisurely. The first possible remedy can be the attempt to adopt a balanced routine.

In other words

Linking Words

, we can slow down our lives a little bit, set a fixed time frame for cooking and develop the willpower to abstain from preservative-filled items and alcoholic drinks. Another solution that needs to be considered is,

governments

Correct word choice

that governments

show examples

are required to encourage working out by building more infrastructures.

This

Linking Words

policy is really effective as it makes residents feel convenient and motivated to train their physiques.

For example

Linking Words

, since the construction of 15 fitness centres funded by Hanoi's authority in 2019,

this

Linking Words

city has witnessed a strong movement of muscular training among the community.

To conclude

Linking Words

, there is a health concern in many nations at the moment.

This

Linking Words

is mainly caused by over-dedication in working and psychological suffering and can be treated by changing our mindset and the financial support from the governments.

Submitted by nhatducmo on Sat Aug 05 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

The essay addresses the causes of increasing average weight and suggests solutions. However, the essay needs to provide a clearer and more detailed explanation about the causes and solutions. Make sure to fully address each aspect by providing specific examples and explanations.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a generally logical structure and supported main points, but the introduction and conclusion could be stronger and more cohesive. Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines the main points of the essay and the conclusion effectively summarizes the key ideas presented.

lexical resource

The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary and uses language that is generally clear and appropriate for the topic. However, some word choices may be imprecise or inaccurate. Aim for more varied and precise vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource.

grammatical range

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and there are some errors in sentence construction and grammar. Focus on using a wider variety of sentence structures and pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and punctuation.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

325 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people think that computer games can be detrimental for children's health. Others think that they can be great for education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is argued by some that playing computer games can have harmful consequences on children's health, while there are others who believe that computer games are beneficial in terms of education. In my opinion, I believe that computer games can badly affect children's eyesight and encourage a sedentary lifestyle, whereas different computer games can help children learn and practice a new language.
5
band
Most countries spend large amounts of money on weapons to defend themselves though they are not at war. Some believe those countries should spend the money to help poor countries. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?
A school of thought holds that governments should allocate money to help underdeveloped nations instead of spending on boosting their military prowess because they are not facing imminent threat of war. In my opinion, I agree with this view.
8
band
In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?
There are a variety of benefits of the Industrial Revolution, but there are many negative effects, especially the decline of animals and plants in some parts of the world. This essay will discuss why this phenomenon is happening and what could be done to solve it.
7.5
band
Please elaborate on your current physical and mental health, including any dental or oral treatment, medical interventions, and mental health therapy or counseling. *
I am lucky enough to have grown up in a family prioritising health over anything. My mother taught me about oral hygiene awareness from an early age. Because of that, I never had severe dental issues in my life. She also likes to ensure we have enough fruit and vitamin stocks at home. Nonetheless, my father is conscious of the importance of physical activity and always reminds me to exercise regularly in order to maintain my physical condition. In our leisure time, my family likes to train together. However, in my early years of medical school, I could not exercise regularly due to the strict academic timetable. Sometimes, I also eat outside and ignore the food’s nutrition. Unfortunately, I caught a gastrointestinal infection right in the week of my clinical skills assessment, which is essential for my grade. The doctor’s examination shows I am severely dehydrated and need an intravenous infusion. That was my first time getting an infusion since I have never been hospitalised except...
5
band
Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Currently, technology has advanced so much to an extent that it has lead to effects to how individuals interact with one another. Although internet has increased isolation among people, I strongly believe that it has lead to positive development due to the fact that it strengthen binding.

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing their levels of habits health and fitness are decreasing cause and solution.

Some people think that computer games can be detrimental for children's health. Others think that they can be great for education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Most countries spend large amounts of money on weapons to defend themselves though they are not at war. Some believe those countries should spend the money to help poor countries. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

Please elaborate on your current physical and mental health, including any dental or oral treatment, medical interventions, and mental health therapy or counseling. *