International travel brings benefits to travellers and the countries visited, but it also harms for the environment. Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?

#travel #travellers #countries #environment

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International

travel

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brings upsides to

travellers

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and the nations visited, but it

Linking Words

also

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is also

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adverse for

ecosystem

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the ecosystem

show examples

Although

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International

travel

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have

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has

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negative

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a negative

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impact on

environment

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the environment

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I believe

merits

Correct article usage

the merits

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of International

travel

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exceed

demerits

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the demerits

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because it can help

travellers

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to experience a new culture and enhance

tourism

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the tourism

show examples

industry

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. On the one hand, the primary drawback of International

travel

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create

Wrong verb form

creating

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environmental

issue

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issues

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namely,

air

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pollution. To illustrate, most

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apply

show examples

International

travel

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done

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is done

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airplanes

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aeroplanes

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, which mean

airplane

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aeroplane

show examples

release Co2 emissions

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into

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the atmosphere.

Therefore

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, more Co2

footprint

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footprints

show examples

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show examples

earth

create

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creates

show examples

air

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contamination, which

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this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can

Remove the redundancy

apply

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harmful

influnece

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influence

people

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people's

show examples

health.

This

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becaue

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because

air

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pollution lead to

seriou

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serious

diseases

such

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Remove the comma

apply

show examples

cancer, high blood pressure, and heart attack.

Furthermore

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air

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contamination is the main cause of climate change and global warming.

On the other hand

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, I would like to argue

benefits

Correct article usage

the benefits

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of International

travel

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significantly

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are significantly

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more than

downsides

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the downsides

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. The first benefit

, International

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is, International

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travel

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can help

travellers

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to experience

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apply

show examples

new cultures and customs.

This

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is because

travellers

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often visit

museume

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museums

and art

gallary

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gallery

to learn about

heritage

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the heritage

show examples

country

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the country

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Moreover

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travellers

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can make relationships with local people, which

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this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can reduce cultural

difference

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differences

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among nations. The second advantage of International

travel

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is can

boosts

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boost

show examples

Correct article usage

the trouism

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trouism

Correct your spelling

tourism

industry

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

countries. To illustrate, many tourists will spend money on

country

Correct article usage

the country

show examples

namely, hotels, public

transprot

Correct your spelling

transport

, and attraction places, which

these money

Change the determiner

this money

show examples

can contribute to

economy

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the economy

show examples

local

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the local

show examples

country.

Additionally

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tourism

Add an article

the tourism

show examples

industry

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can generate employment opportunities for local inhabitants,

For example

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, many local inhabitants will work as, tour

guided

Wrong verb form

guides

show examples

, waiters

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show examples

hotels, and drivers on buses.

To sum up

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Although

Linking Words

International

travel

Use synonyms

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

detrimental consequence on

ecosystem

Correct article usage

the ecosystem

show examples

I think

Correct article usage

the

show examples

advantages of International

travel

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greater outweigh

drawbacks

Correct article usage

the drawbacks

show examples

because it can help

travellers

Use synonyms

to experience a new culture and boosts

tourism

Correct article usage

the tourism

show examples

industry

Use synonyms

Submitted by faiz3177 on Sat Aug 05 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
54
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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International travel brings benefits to travellers and the countries visited, but it also harms for the environment. Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

The average age for individuals to give birth is increasing. Some people think that it will have negative impact on family and country. What is your opinion about this?

Many Offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishments. Why is this happening and what measures can be taken to tackle these problems

Overweight Children In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should be responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that developed countries have a higher responsibility to combat climate change than developing countries. Others believe that all countries should have the same responsibilities towards protecting the environment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?