Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and the governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The affordability of higher tertiary degrees has emerged as one of the topics of interest in society, especially when
tuition
fees
are inexorably increasing. People believe that the
government
are responsible for the budget of the entire undergraduate level, regardless of students’ financial background. I personally hold an opposing opinion about
this
matter.
This
essay will provide
further
explanation as to why the
government
should not apply the free-of-charge college
policy
. First and foremost, it is understandable why people advocate the idea that the
government
should abolish college
tuition
fees
for all students.
Firstly
,
this
policy
allows everyone to pursue higher education levels, those who equip themselves with a degree will stand a chance for employment than those who do not. It is especially meaningful for underprivileged freshmen and their families. The regime is expected to relieve less well-off parents’ financial burden for their kids' pursuit of educational enrichment and create a better future for these families. Other than that, the elimination
tuition
fee
policy
creates a huge skilled human capital to bring to the workforce, which people trust will empower the country’s competence and attractiveness, it is imperative for a developing country to foster Foreign direct investment. The belief is that the
policy
will ultimately develop the nation’s socio-economic landscape.
However
, there are certain pronounced drawbacks if the regulators implement the free
tuition
fees
regime. On the individual level, the scholars may lose their dedication and concentration in studying if they have no responsibility for discipline
fees
. An inevitable consequence is that academic performance as a whole will be deteriorated. On the societal level, it will put a financial strain on the
government
’s coffers, leading to budget deficits, tax hikes, and reduced welfare among others and more crucial when it may have a negative effect on the nation’s long-term growth and sustainability strategies
such
as public infrastructures and transportations, or green development. In conclusion, when there are several advantages to the abolition of
tuition
fees
, its disadvantages far surpass them.
Therefore
, the
government
should not waive tertiary
tuition
fees
.
Submitted by hoangthoakinhte on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure to introduce your main points in the introduction, providing a clear roadmap of your argument. While you do present your thesis, elaborating on the main points you will discuss can guide the reader even more effectively.
Coherence & Cohesion
Transition more smoothly between paragraphs and ideas. Use varied linking phrases and topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to better signal changes in topic and argument flow.
Task Achievement
Be more precise in your examples. While you mention the benefits and drawbacks of government-funded tertiary education, providing specific, real-world examples or data will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.
Task Achievement
Work on developing a more nuanced conclusion that reflects on the complexity of the issue. Summarize your key points and perhaps suggest a compromise or a more sophisticated solution than simply agreeing or disagreeing.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Higher education
  • Accessibility
  • Social mobility
  • Meritocracy
  • Economic growth
  • Equality
  • Subsidize
  • Fiscal sustainability
  • Human capital
  • Incentivize
  • Underfunded
  • Tuition fees
  • Academic achievement
  • Workforce
  • Tax burden
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