IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Whoever controls the media also controls opinions and attitudes of people and there is little can be done to rectify this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#controls #media #attitudes #people
Controlling
people
’s minds and attitudes is one of the major problems which many societies suffer from and changing
this
 situation is avoidable. In my point of view, I totally agree with
this
 statement because I heard before about what happens on various platforms to share fake news. On the one hand, it is vital for each government to make rules about the circumstances of how
people
 use the media without any limitation which can be seen in some specific countries.
This
 can avert some possible problems which may cause by a minority of that community.
For instance
, cyberbullying is widespread in recent years and there are lots of victims who experience
this
 situation and maybe threaten to share their data
such
 as photos and identification cards if they don’t prepare the amount of money that they need.
On the other hand
, technology has revolutionized
people
's lifestyles in recent years, so some authorities are concerned about that. Not only are restriction policies useless, but
also
 they are not acceptable among
people
 because they are somehow unethical.
People
 try to check information that they see or hear on various websites and it can be ridiculous to give them fake news on television or other online platform.
For example
, a video can be viral on Instagram or Youtube, but it might contain wrong data because a company
such
 as Meta wants to be viral.
Overall
, some countries try to control
people
 through media,
however
,
this
 approach is completely unethical. Making new policies about media is necessary but the restriction is not acceptable.
Submitted by mhshid on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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