There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

#music #world #country

There are several types of

music

around the world which are essential for us. Traditional

music

is very crucial in our life than international

music

which is listened to everywhere. I believe that traditional

music

plays an important role in everybody's life. There are different types of

songs

which are heard by everybody in the world.

Music

has a significant role. Nobody can con imagine life without

music

. First of all,

people

can not celebrate traditional customs without

songs

. Because celebrating events with

songs

would be memorable and

also

helps to add fun and entertainment to parties.

Moreover

songs

can help to improve

people

's mood. Because when someone feels very sad circumstance themselves,

music

can help to enhance their mood and helps to get out of depression. Nowadays, traditional

songs

are more significant than other county's

music

. But most youngsters prefer to listen to

songs

which are from foreign county's.

However

, traditional

music

plays an essential role.

Firstly

, any other county's

music

is unsuitable for our religion.

For example

, in

this

song, different type of words is used which is not fit.

In addition

, listening to traditional

music

can help to preserve our traditionalism. Because nowadays our traditionalism is disappearing. If

people

hear international

music

, it affects our culture.

Moreover

celebrating events and customs with traditional

music

helps to develop our national

songs

. Because when

people

listen to a lot of

music

, singers want to create new

songs

and it

also

helps to develop our country. In conclusion, we can not imagine celebrations without

music

and song helps to improve our mood. Nowadays

although

most

people

listen to international

music

, national

songs

are more valuable.

Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on Thu Aug 10 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

emotional release
cultural significance
globalization
cultural exchange
technology
preservation
cultural heritage
social cohesion
expression
consumption
production
traditional music
international music
diversity
identity

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?

You are unhappy with a service you received at a restaurant. Write a letter to the restaurant manager. In your letter: - Describe the situation. - Explain why you were unhappy. - Suggest what you would like the manager to do.

Transport delays and long journey times are a widespread phenomenon in many cities today. What are the causes of this problem, and how could the situation be improved