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Writing Samples
Band 6

nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development
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The number of people with disease or any
health
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 disorder who avoid regular treatment systems and try new ways
instead
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 is increasing these days. From my point of view,
this
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 approach is not a healthy and positive way to tackle
health
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problems
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 and it affects both the individuals and the community as a whole so, in
this
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 essay I will discuss the reasons supporting my opinion. Considering the social challenge, it should be mentioned that the governments allocate a vast amount of their budgets to the national
health
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care
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system
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 by training and educating doctors, nurses and other professional staff, establishing hospitals and
health
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care
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 centres, providing and producing medicines and supporting pharmaceutical research to decrease the rate of their citizens’
health
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 disorder. Individuals who try alternative medicines and treatments may cause the disease to get worse and they will impose a redoubled burden on the society and
health
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care
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system
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 because there is no certain way to make sure about the remedy of the alternatives and there may be not sufficient supervision controlling their function. At the personal level, for the same reason, since alternative remedies and medicines can not be fully controlled by the
health
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care
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system
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’s authorities and professionals, using them can give rise to serious and crucial
health
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 disorders which have no cure or remedy even in the regular
health
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system
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.
Also
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, the consequences of using alternatives may not be observed in the long term or it can cause other side effects which form multiple
health
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problems
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 for individuals who used them as a cure.
To sum up
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, I think using alternatives
instead
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 of a normal and assured
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 is not a safe and sound approach to tackle diseases or
health
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problems
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, because their function can not be fully supervised and it can lead to serious
health
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problems
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 for people who are trying them and their societies. There are so many safe and under-control facilities that can help one to cure the diseases so it would be more beneficial to use these regular remedies and
health
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 services.
Submitted by eemami14 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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