IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The following bar chart shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The following bar chart shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #bar #modes #transport #travel #work #european #city #information #features #comparisons
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This
Linking Words
 graph illustrates the proportion of the modes of
travel
Use synonyms
 to and from work in a city in Europe in three different years.
According to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 ,figure
people
Use synonyms
 mainly used the bus, car, or bike as their transport service
while
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 by foot in the years of 1960,1980, and 2000.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the rate of citizens using cars for transportation was getting sharply increased over all
this
Linking Words
 time. The proportion of going and returning from work by bike and foot decreased significantly.
Although
Linking Words
 in 1980,
people
Use synonyms
 mostly used buses and rarely went by their own foot,
whereas
Linking Words
 in 1960 the most popular
travel
Use synonyms
 method was walking.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 the usage of buses was highest in 1980
while
Linking Words
 it showed its lowest percentage in 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see that the usage of cars had been increased in 2000 more than any other method. On the other ,hand
people
Use synonyms
 were avoid bikes as their
travel
Use synonyms
 method to work in 2000.
Submitted by skn  on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words travel, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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