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Band 2

Some countries with long average working hours are more economically successful than their countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree?

#countries #hours #time
Many people argue that extension of
work
 duration
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
 towards the development of a nation's economic status. I strongly agree with
this
 view and believe that working longer means achieving more in less
time
 and
flexibility
Correct article usage
the flexibility
show examples
 of
work
 outweighs any other disadvantage. To start with, lengthier working hours aid to accomplish tasks before the deadline.
This
 means that the companies can attain
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 goals before the expected
time
 and undertake more tasks.
Furthermore
,
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
 in the pace of production and distribution,
consequently
 would surge the economic activity in a region.
For example
, during the mission of
International
Correct article usage
the International
show examples
 Space Research
organisation
Capitalize word
Organisation
show examples
 to send a satellite to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Mars, the expected preparation
time
 was about 4 years,
however
, the date when the Earth is closest to Mars was due one year,
the
Correct word choice
so the
show examples
 employees decided to
work
 around the clock, and launched the satellite rocket in 12 months'
time
.
Hence
, for economic
benefits
Add a comma
,benefits
show examples
 employees should be encouraged to
work
 longer
period
Fix the agreement mistake
periods
show examples
 of
time
.
Secondly
,
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
 from home has provided an opportunity to
work
 in
own
Correct pronoun usage
my own
show examples
 comfort zone p.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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