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Writing Samples
Band 6

The pie chart shows how people use four modes of transport in the city of Edmonton,as well as how the table shows data from five different driving reasons.

The pie chart shows how people use four modes of transport in the city of Edmonton,as well as how the table shows data from five different driving reasons.
#people #four #modes #transport #city #edmonton #data #five
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The pie chart shows how
people
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 four modes of transport in the city of Edmonton,
as well as
Linking Words
 how the table shows data from five different driving reasons.
Overall
Linking Words
,natives prefer LRT(Light Rail Transit),buses and taxis,and the rest of the
people
Use synonyms
 mainly
use
Use synonyms
 cars to go
work
Change preposition
to work
show examples
. As we can see,the residents of the city of Edmonton like to drive the car the most and
this
Linking Words
 was 45%,
while
Linking Words
 the LRT is exactly one tenth less.The remaining 20% was divided equally between a bus and a taxi.And it
also
Linking Words
 means that
people
Use synonyms
 who like to drive
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
 than twice the total number of bus and taxi users.And those who
use
Use synonyms
 LRT are more than three times the number of
people
Use synonyms
 choosing a bus and those who
use
Use synonyms
 a taxi. The reasons why cars were used in the city are 55% more than the rest.And the
wihdrawal
Correct your spelling
withdrawal
 of children to school and business activities
totaled
Change the spelling
totalled
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
40% and 45%.And the interesting thing is that the proportions of those who
use
Use synonyms
 the car for shopping and leisure participation were the same
per centages
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of 15%.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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