Childhood obesity is becoming a problem throughout the developed world. Because of this, some people think that adverts for fast food, sweets and sugary snacks should not be allowed in schools and colleges. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#childhood #obesity #world #people #adverts #food #sweets #snacks #schools #colleges

Nowadays, childhood obesity has sparked a heated debate and drawn public attention around the world. Some people are hardly convinced that advertisements for unhealthy

food

like fast

food

and sweets snacks should be avoided in educational institutions like

schools

and colleges. After considering deeply all the relevant factors, I decided that I agree with

this

statement. In the following essay, I will explain why. First and foremost, when viewed from a psychological perspective, it is evident that

influences people in general.

Moreover

, it has a stronger power on young people. As a matter of fact, children learn really fast because they are developing their brains.

For

this

reason, any kind of stimulation is crucial for their learning.

For instance

, a prominent scientist once stated that children learn 10 times faster than adults. It

thus

clearly shows us that bad

is really inappropriate for them.

Additionally

, another social factor that should

also

be taken into account is that educational institutions are normally related to good learning,

while

this

kind of

is undoubtedly negative. As far as society is concerned, the ultimate aim of the school is to teach in a proper manner.

Nevertheless

, by allowing fast

food

advertising inside their spaces,

schools

are not respecting their goal.

For instance

according to

an article in the Economist,

schools

are the place where children are mostly influenced during their entire childhood.

This

is a clear indication that they have to be protected from these negative influences. In conclusion,

due to

the reasons outlined above, I have a strong belief that the

for unhealthy

food

inside

schools

has to be suspended and forbidden in the future. In order to do it, institutions like the public administration have to consider the creation of written laws inside the constitution that stop

this

inappropriate tendency.

Submitted by Andrea Barreto on Tue Aug 22 2023

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

302 words

8.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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