Success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

#success #wealth #belongings #measure #person

An individual is often assessed by his income and lifestyle status in society. The greater the bank account balance, the higher the ranking among people in the same community.

This

is indeed a bitter truth in general and unfortunately, often the

success

of a

person

is determined by his wealth.

However

, In my opinion, there are many parameters and one can not label someone as successful just because of his high earnings. In

this

essay, I will discuss and suggest my point of view and other essential factors to support the same.

Firstly

, regarding wealth as the most important measure of

success

. It is indeed a crucial factor in today's world, as the purchasing power of a

person

and how much one can spend, determine his or her status in society.

For instance

, someone with a beautiful home and expensive belongings in a safe and well-connected place and with vehicles to drive will be considered more victorious in

life

than who is struggling to pay

money

for daily chores.

However

, having said so, there is another side to the story too. The measure of

success

life

has different meanings for different individuals. Fulfilment of an individual dream and happiness brought in

life

, whether that includes

money

or not, I believe is the best measure to determine progress.

Furthermore

, respect in society and a good healthy

life

are other important determinants.

For example

, if a rich

person

is fraudulent and earns

money

but

also

has a bad reputation or has a lifelong illness, will surely be not measured as successful despite having large bank balances.

To sum up

, it is certainly true that often prosperity is confused with

success

as we see people from that angle.

Nevertheless

, there are other considerably more important measures than

money

to count a

person

as a triumphant one.

Submitted by sonyasharma01 on Tue Aug 29 2023

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task response

Provide more specific examples and elaborate on the points made to strengthen your arguments.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph is logically connected to the next to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to enrich the essay and convey your ideas more precisely.

grammatical range

Use a variety of complex sentence structures to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical structures.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

304 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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