The chart below shows changes in three different areas of crime in manchester city centre from 2003 to 2012.

The chart below shows changes in three different areas of crime in manchester city centre from 2003 to 2012.
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This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

line chart depicts the changing number of three different types of crime in the
central
Replace the word
centre

The word central doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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of Manchester City between 2003 and 2012. It is clear from
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

graph that, Robbery shows a remained level over the years.
According to
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

what is shown,
burglary
Fix the agreement mistake
burglaries

It seems that burglary may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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between 2003 and 2004 accounted for the top of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

graph about 3700,
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however
Add a comma
,however

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase however. Consider adding a comma.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

number decreased sharply until
Correct pronoun usage
it beceme
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Correct pronoun usage
it beceme

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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beceme
Correct your spelling
became
become
almost 1000 in 2008 and increased in 2009 to just 1500 and remained steady until the end of the period.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, car theft climbed from 2009 to 2012 from around 2400 to around 2700,
whish
Correct your spelling
which

The word whish doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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is the highest rate, after a long time of steady figures. In terms of robbery crimes, it
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

showed levelled number between 500 to under 1000,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the highest rate was in 2005 and the lowest was in 2008.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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