Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a “gap year”; before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to a broaden their horizons. For others this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #year #“gap #year” #work #university #chance #broaden #horizons #waste #time

From a very young age, my parents challenged me with complex courses and different clubs. At the age of four, I learned the English language, which was the third language after Kazakh and Russian. At the age of six, I played the piano and started my career in sports-ballroom dances; these hobbies taught me to be disciplined and ambitious

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because there are no limitations to personal growth. As a teenager, I discussed with my parents about our own impact on the world and society,

therefore

, the desire to make a positive influence led me to another challenge. My parents’ business specializes in wooden toys, so I worked as a volunteer at my parents’ shop to analyze the market, apply some strategies to increase the number of customers and

also

recognize some trends in wooden toys at present.

This

experience and my parents’ involvement gave me the most valuable opportunity to try myself in business and

that is

why I chose

this

field as my future occupation.

Submitted by ryskulovstreet on Tue Sep 19 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

166 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a “gap year”; before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to a broaden their horizons. For others this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because we see the same TV shows, advertisements, fashion and follow the same brands. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

As a result of electronic inventions such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

“Scientists believe that in order to protect the environment, people must use less energy in their daily lives. However, most people have not changed the way they live. Why do you think many people ? What could be done to encourage them to take action?

Do you think businesses should hire employees who will spend their entire lives working for the company? Explain why do you agree or disagree. Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.