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Writing Samples
Band 7

Air pollution is one of the largest problems the world is facing today. What are some causes of air pollution and what measures can be proposed to solve this problem?

#air #pollution #world #measures
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Nowadays
air
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 contamination is considered a huge issue in the world. In
this
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 essay, we will discuss the main
causes
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 and the ways to mitigate
this
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 issue. One of the primary
causes
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 that contributes to
air
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 pollution is the overpopulation of the planet which
causes
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 a huge amount of industrial activities in order to provide the population with their basic requirements. Overpopulation of the Earth negatively affects not only the environment but
also
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 the ecosystem surrounding us by constructing a lot of factories, and power plants, which gives rise to the release of emissions, fumes,household and industrial waste and deforestation.
In addition
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, in some countries
land
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 allocation is not properly conducted and a lot of landscapes with unique ecosystems are being destroyed for the construction of recreational facilities or agricultural and farming purposes. To address
this
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 problem, one effective solution is to
use
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 alternative energy sources that would contribute to the reduction of fossil fuel consumption.
Furthermore
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, another effective measure is the reforestation of certain areas to increase the release of oxygen and restore the ozone layer by lowering the level of carbon dioxide.
Also
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,
land
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use
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 standards should be enforced worldwide in order not to interrupt the untouched
land
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 for personal or agricultural
use
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.
Due to
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 the difficulty of satisfying the food demand of above 8 billion people in the world, it is crucial to find alternatives for agricultural and livestock purposes to minimize the deterioration of
air
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 quality.
To sum up
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, it is apparent that
air
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 pollution is a grave global issue which is caused by gas emissions from fossil fuels, vehicles and deforestation processes
due to
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 improper
land
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 acquisition. To mitigate these
causes
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,it is necessary to decrease the consumption of unrenewable energy sources, reclaim deforested areas and stricter
land
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use
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 standards.
Submitted by manshuk.sabyrova on

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task response
The essay provides a clear response to the task question and presents comprehensive ideas. Clear examples are provided to support the main points. The essay also acknowledges the causes and proposes measures to address the problem. However, the introduction and conclusion need to be strengthened to provide a more effective overall structure.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is well-maintained, with clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more explicitly linked to the main body of the essay to strengthen the overall coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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