Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? You should write at least 250 words. Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

In today's diverse world,
music
is a multifaceted phenomenon, encompassing a plethora of genres, styles, and cultures. It holds a profound place in our lives, serving as a means of entertainment, emotional expression, and cultural preservation.
This
essay will assert that
music
is not only a fundamental necessity but
also
that both traditional and international
music
have their unique roles and importance.
To begin
with, the significance of
music
in our lives cannot be overstated. It is a universal language that transcends boundaries and connects people worldwide. Whether it's the traditional melodies of a remote village or the international hits played on radio stations globally,
music
has the power to evoke emotions, convey messages, and foster connections among individuals from diverse backgrounds.
Therefore
, the need for
music
is deeply ingrained in human culture and psychology. Traditional
music
plays a crucial role in preserving a nation's cultural heritage. It acts as a repository of history, traditions, and values, serving as a medium through which a community can pass down its heritage from one generation to another.
For instance
, classical Indian
music
not only entertains but
also
conveys ancient philosophical and cultural knowledge.
Thus
, traditional
music
is instrumental in maintaining cultural identity and continuity.
On the other hand
, international
music
has become increasingly prevalent in our interconnected world. It serves as a bridge between cultures, fostering mutual understanding and appreciation. Genres like pop, rock, and hip-hop have transcended national borders, becoming a shared global culture.
For example
, the popularity of Latin
music
, like reggaeton, has led to cultural exchanges between Latin American and non-Latin American societies, enriching the global musical landscape. In conclusion,
music
is an essential aspect of human existence, offering emotional solace, cultural preservation, and global connectivity. Both traditional and international
music
hold their own importance, with traditional
music
serving as a custodian of cultural heritage and international
music
acting as a catalyst for cross-cultural understanding. In our interconnected world, the coexistence of these musical forms enriches our lives and contributes to the diversity of human culture, making
music
an indispensable part of our existence.
Submitted by syifanurul.maulani1 on

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task response
Your essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic and effectively addresses the task. However, be mindful of providing more specific examples and evidences to support your arguments. Additionally, ensure that your language fluency meets the expected level for an IELTS essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, and it effectively introduces and concludes the topic. However, consider providing smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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