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Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#people #culture #tourism #revenue
There is a controversy about whether should we use
culture
 to earn
money
 or not. Some
people
 think that using
culture
 and traditional
activities
 to earn
money
 is an offence and will ruin the
culture
 but others believe commercialization of traditional
activities
 is the
way
 to protect and develop the
culture
. We will discuss both opinions. On one hand, we can understand why some conservative
people
 protest using cultural
activities
 to make
money
.
Culture
 is an important part of any nation. It was made and completed by artists after hundreds of years of history.
Therefore
, in each cultural performance, we can see the sacred spirit of each country. For those reasons, some
people
 feel angry when traditional
activities
 are used as a good to sell for
money
.
On the other hand
, I believe commercials should be considered as the only
way
 to protect the
culture
. There are two reasons why we should follow
this
way
.
First,
cultural activity only can survive if it attracts young
people
 to learn and teach it to the next generations in the future. To attract young
people
, we should make a
culture
 showing a profitable
job
 because no one can do an unpaid
job
 for a long time.
For example
, in some countries with famous cultures
such
 as China or Japan,
people
 have to pay a lot of
money
 for a traditional performance. The second reason is that with the revenue from traditional shows, artists can present better performances in order to retain the quality of cultural
activities
 and satisfy the client as well.
Overall
,
culture
 is an indispensable part of any country as protecting and developing
culture
 are our sacred
job
. To do so, I believe the best
way
 is to show traditional tourism so that our
culture
 is well known all over the world and our artist have income to keep their
job
 and pass it on our future generations.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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