In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative situation?

Owing a
house
is more crucial than renting in some parts of the world.
This
essay will explicate the reasons behind it followed by the view that it is definitely a positive trend. There are numerous rationales behind
this
perspective. First and foremost, having own
house
is a symbol of status and a luxurious lifestyle.
In other words
, individuals who own houses are considered wealthy persons in society.
Furthermore
, tenants do not have the legal rights to do any refurbishments
while
the owner can renovate his
house
as per his choice.
For instance
, no one can edify the government-owned buildings, and the victims of it can face huge fines and jail.
Thus
, it is quite evident that reputation in society and modifications as per one's choices are the prominent factors behind
this
scenario.
Moreover
,
this
essay believes that it is a positive trend because it encourages people to pay taxes and secure their future as well. To go deeper, the owner of the property needs to pay a levy annually and a mortgage monthly.
In other words
, it is a source of revenue for the government.
Additionally
, owning a
house
contributes towards secure golden years. To illustrate, it is a hardship for senior citizens to live in rented apartments because of the restrictions and limitations.
On the other hand
, he/she can live hassle-free on his own property.
Consequently
, it is vital for the development of a country and peaceful retirement days. In a nutshell, purchasing property is a sign of a rich personality and freedom to make any modifications. I believe that
this
is a positive trend because it not only has reaped benefits to legal authorities in the form of a tax but
also
has rich awards to the old people for living a desirable life at their own terms and conditions without the interruption of others.
Submitted by sdeepkaur9 on

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task response
The essay largely responds to the task, providing reasons behind the preference in owning houses over renting and discussing whether this trend is positive or negative. However, the response could have been more diversified by including potential drawbacks of homeownership and portraying a balanced view.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear and logical structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs and a conclusion. The writer has used cohesive connectors effectively. However, it might be better to avoid using 'This essay' frequently which is not academic enough.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary. However, phrases like 'rich awards to the old people for living a desirable life at their own terms and conditions' are slightly verbose and could be made more concise.
grammatical range
The candidate uses a mix of sentence structures, including complex sentences. However, there are some minor errors in grammar and punctuation. For example, 'Owing a house is more crucial than renting in some parts of the world.' should be 'Owning a house is seen as more crucial than renting in some parts of the world.'

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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