Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Over the past few decades, there has been a dramatic increase in environmental issues
such
as the growing number of endangered species and plants or
climate
change
. Some people believe that preventing the loss of particular animals is the most crucial measure, but others argue that we have to pay attention to more important natural
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
. On the one hand, there are plenty of defenceless creatures that are almost vanishing from nature. These kinds of animals or plants proceed to live in places that are able to ensure their safety,
however
,
this
can not be continued for a long time. Wild animals have to adapt to their surroundings to survive without the assistance of people.
This
can lead to an unbalance in the ecosystem, which is created perfectly.
Consequently
, we have to avoid the loss of the population of some species to balance the environment again.
On the other hand
, there are some huge problems that are capable of destroying humanity. One of them is
climate
change
, which is so tough to solve. Because a bunch of manufacturing industries consume raw materials like coal or oil that emit carbon dioxide.
This
element is an essential part of the stuff that we use in our daily routine, and
this
is
also
the main cause of
climate
change
.
Due to
its demand, it is difficult to exterminate from society. If we tackle
climate
change
, we can
also
save humans and endangered creatures. I completely agree with
this
statement.
To sum up
all aforementioned points, I consider that tackling the issue of
climate
change
can
change
the state of the world, including endangered species.
Submitted by ieltssat8 on

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Task Response
Ensure that all parts of the essay directly address the prompt and provide a comprehensive response. Consider addressing the opposing viewpoint more thoroughly to show a deeper understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Use transition words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
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