Many young people, after finishing thier studies, are unable to find jobs. Why? What are the effects on an individual as well as the society? What cam be done to solve their problem.?

Experimentation shows that people's characteristics

Change the verb form

are

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more depend on genetics than

Add an article

the experience

show examples

experience

Fix the agreement mistake

experiences

show examples

we have through different situations in life. I totally agree with

latter

Correct article usage

the latter

show examples

viewpoint. On the one hand, it is already proved that

children

Use synonyms

tend to have some of the characteristics of their parents. Genes are responsible for having common things in parents and their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, if parents are angry and violent in nature

then

Linking Words

there is a 30 % possibility of a child having the same

according to

Linking Words

the research of Toronto University.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there is a saying like begets like means we became the same atmosphere around us.

For instance

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, if

children

Use synonyms

grow up in an atmosphere where everyone is rude and becomes violent in small things

then

Linking Words

the

children

Use synonyms

get used to it

while

Linking Words

growing

then

Linking Words

they tend to be attracted towards crime.

In contrast

Linking Words

, good guidance and companionship can lead to having good characteristics in a child. Everyone faces difficult

experience

Fix the agreement mistake

experiences

show examples

in the initial period when they begin with something new and it has huge flourishment on one's personality to develop

accordingly

Linking Words

. But there are few individuals who are not influenced by the result of any situation and experiences and remain

good

Rephrase

as good

show examples

as they are. In many cases, the

children

Use synonyms

saw crime happening and traumatic memories affect them throughout their lives. In conclusion, genetic things may bring some character with them in

children

Use synonyms

but the lifelong experiences they face in their life play a vital role in one's personality and development.

vivekchovatiya8

Oct 7, 2023

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Task Achievement

Your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Your introduction should provide an overview of the essay topic and your stance, while your conclusion should summarize your main points and provide a final thought. Make sure to include these sections in your essay to fulfill the task requirements.

Task Achievement

Your essay offers some relevant points, but they could be further developed and supported. Try to provide more specific examples and elaborate on your ideas to strengthen your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay lacks a clear logical structure. Make sure to organize your ideas in a logical and coherent way, using paragraphs to separate different points. This will make your essay easier to read and follow.

Lexical Resource

Your essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary. Try to use a wider variety of words and phrases to convey your ideas more effectively. You can do this by reading more and expanding your vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Your essay contains some grammatical errors. Review your use of verb tenses, sentence structures, and punctuation to improve the accuracy of your writing. Consider seeking additional feedback or practicing more to improve your grammar skills.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

251 words

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Many young people, after finishing thier studies, are unable to find jobs. Why? What are the effects on an individual as well as the society? What cam be done to solve their problem.?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, an increasing number of people are moving to cities that have contributed to increased pollution in cities. What problems does this cause?

The most important aim for science should be to improve peeople's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

There is a problem in the road outside your house. Write a letter to your local councilor. In your letter, introduce yourself, explain what the problem is, and tell the councilors what you would like to be done.

Some people believe that it is essential to include Physical Education classes in the curriculum for all school-age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.