Some people believe that it is important to spend a lot of money on family celebrations, while others think it is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your view.
It is considered by some that it is essential to invest a stupendous amount of
money
on family celebrations
, while
few believe that money
will be wasted if people
spend too much on family gathering
. In Fix the agreement mistake
gatherings
this
essay, I will discuss both the
opinions.
On the one hand, many think it is important to spend too much Correct article usage
apply
money
on family celebrations
. It is due to
the fact that in
these days, Change preposition
apply
people
rarely get time to be with each other, and it is through family occasions people
can spend time together. For instance
, my uncle is an engineer, and he is a busy person, and
to make the family occasions Correct word choice
apply
enjoyable
for him at my house that happen once Correct word choice
apply
in
a year, I need to organize something big by spending too much so that it becomes memorable Change preposition
apply
to
him. Change preposition
for
Thus
, it is important to spend money
extravagantly on family celebrations
.
On the other hand
, others think that it is a waste of money
. Firstly
, it is due to
the fact that in family celebrations
, people
at times spend lots of money
just for one day, and some festival money
can also
be spent on donation
as there are Fix the agreement mistake
donations
people
who cannot eat and enjoy just
because they have Correct pronoun usage
it just
shortage
of Add an article
a shortage
money
. Also
, if too much money
is spent on occasions like that, people
will not have any savings for themselves. Their living standard will deteriorate, and they will not be able to keep up with the
modern society as items are getting expensive day by day. Correct article usage
apply
Hence
, money
should be spent wisely on family celebrations
.
In conclusion, there is a huge debate on this
issue whether money
should be spent extravagantly or not on family celebrations
, and this
amount of spending depends on person to person.Submitted by ieltsexpert185 on
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coherence cohesion
Provide a clearer introduction and conclusion that summarize the main points.
task achievement
Develop your supporting arguments and examples further to strengthen your overall response.
