Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid.

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Currently, the gap between prosperous and poor countries is expanding. Affluent cities usually give financial help to underdeveloped cities,

however

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, they cannot handle the problem in that way.

Thus

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, developed

nations

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should help these countries in different ways rather than financial ones.

This

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idea has both benefits and drawbacks. I completely agree with the latter point of view.

Firstly

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, giving financial assistance to wealthy

nations

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has some demerits. What I mean by

that is

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maybe there is a high level of corruption in underdeveloped cities.

This

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is simply because nowadays nobody wants to give help to needy citizens. Government can be another reason why some places do not develop.

This

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is simply because maybe they do not know how to spend money for what.

As a consequence

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, there might be a lack of public facilities or employment opportunities.

Secondly

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, prosperous

nations

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should establish their own firms and companies in these less developed

nations

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As a result

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, there might be some job opportunities.

For instance

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, if there is a factory or company which is situated in a poor country, their factories require employees in order to start producing something.

Furthermore

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, the population may have well-paid jobs to take care of their families.

In addition

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, these firms can give a helping hand to the government

such

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as building new accommodations, schools, hospitals and others. Apart from that, its change causes the improvement of public transportation.

For example

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, companies should have enough workers, but not all of them do not leave close to their workplace. So, it requires a good transport system. The corporations may create that for their employees.

To sum up

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, personally, I believe that high levels of corruption and weakness of government are the primary causes of poverty in poor

nations

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However

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, there are more pros rather than cons.

omondavlat91Tue Oct 17 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction and conclusion could be more clearly presented and connected to the main idea of the essay. Ensure that the ideas are logically connected throughout the essay.

Task Achievement

The response provides some relevant ideas, but it could be more comprehensive. Ensure that all aspects of the task are addressed, and use specific examples more effectively to support the points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

poverty alleviation
economic inequality
developing nations
foreign aid
sustainable growth
technical assistance
expertise
infrastructure
education
fair trade
trade barriers
sustainable development
environmental conservation

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Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid.

Your opinion

Some feel governments should invest in preserving minority languages, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (Write 250 words.)

Young people do not spend their holidays and weekends doing outdoor activities such as hiking and climbing in nature. Why is this? And how can we encourage them to go out?

Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your knowledge or experience.

The number of students studying science at university is constantly declining. What do you think are the causes? What effects will this have on our society?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?