It is often tought that the increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violence in the media. Do you agree that this is the main cause of juvenile crime? What solutions can you offer to deal with this issue?

#tought #crime #violence #media #offer

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It can be considered that a high rate of juvenile delinquency is mostly related to

media

Use synonyms

violence

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, I strongly agree with

this

Linking Words

statement.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, there are some solutions that can be taken to tackle teenage crimes namely limiting the watching time and controlling the

media

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

violence

Use synonyms

in the

media

Use synonyms

can

Add a missing verb

have an

show examples

adverse influence on youngster's attitudes and behaviors.

In other words

Linking Words

, watching violent films or playing

this

Linking Words

type of video

games

Fix the agreement mistake

game

show examples

by young people may push them

mimicking

Change the verb form

to mimic

show examples

violent acts in real-time.

For example

Linking Words

, some movie stars are good role models for teens to follow, so they can imitate their

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

like shooting, stealing or others.

Hence

Linking Words

, they can be easily influenced because of their immaturity and

lacking

Replace the word

lack

show examples

of parental guidance.

Secondly

Linking Words

, the reason why

media

Use synonyms

may affect

to commit

Wrong verb form

the likelihood of committing

show examples

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

by minors is their mental diseases.

In particular

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

mental illnesses can be affected by watching violent scenes.

Finally

Linking Words

, there are two solutions to combat

this

Linking Words

issue.

Correct your spelling

One

show examples

of the effective ways is limiting the viewing time of violent films or online video games by them.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, parents must set clear guidelines for using

media

Use synonyms

by their kids and they should involve them

into

Change preposition

show examples

extracurricular activities. If parents

will

Verb problem

apply

show examples

monitor their children's

media

Use synonyms

activities, it allows

Correct pronoun usage

them to

show examples

prevent a possible committing

crimes

Fix the agreement mistake

crime

show examples

by minors. Another measure is that governments have to

stricter

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

control the mass

media

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, all mass

media

Use synonyms

should be checked

Change preposition

apply

show examples

including harassment and inappropriate

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

, which need to be banned by authorities.

To sum up

Linking Words

, I believe that

media

Use synonyms

violence

Use synonyms

is simply

example

Add an article

an example

show examples

of real-world

violence

Use synonyms

for youngsters.

However

Linking Words

, destructive

media

Use synonyms

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

should always be restricted and these significant steps to protect young people from potential harm.

Submitted by s_syedy on Tue Oct 24 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Write a letter to the manager of the organisation where you have been working. In your letter: describe the work you have been doing explain why you can no longer do this work recommend another person who is interested in the work
Hope you are doing well.
5
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believ that they should be free to work in another country if they wish.
While some people take the view that experts like doctors and engineers must work in the country where they learned, others believe that they should go to the desired countries they want. In my opinion, it is better for the individuals to work freely as they have rights to manage their prospective careers.
6.5
band
Some people think governments should make university education free, but others think students should pay fees by themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
By all means, education should be free. The purpose of learning itself has already paid for the cost. The concept of learning can be transformed if we change the beginning. When we pay for a course upfront, the lecturer is obligated to teach and pass the pupils. Conversely, the pupils have the right to be made understand and to graduate.
4.5
band
n many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Over the past decade, there has been tremendous advancement in technology in various sectors of the economy with the effects being both positive and negative.Some people argue that these developments have widened the gap between the wealthy and those with low incomes in the society.
8
band
Many people go to university for academic study. More people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some argued that vocational training should be encouraged for enrollment to produce sufficient future competent labourers in the context of an increasing number of people taking part in the academic field. I completely agree with this opinion, as I believe qualified researchers and workers are equally important and their numbers should be balanced.

It is often tought that the increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violence in the media. Do you agree that this is the main cause of juvenile crime? What solutions can you offer to deal with this issue?

Write a letter to the manager of the organisation where you have been working. In your letter: describe the work you have been doing explain why you can no longer do this work recommend another person who is interested in the work

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believ that they should be free to work in another country if they wish.

Some people think governments should make university education free, but others think students should pay fees by themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

n many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people go to university for academic study. More people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?