IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

People think that government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles to solve environmental problems. Give your opinion

#people #government #cost #fuel #cars #vehicles
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Many individuals believe that government should put in place policies to protect the environment, one of them is raising the cost of
fuel
Use synonyms
 for vehicles. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 action can only solve a limited part of the environmental problems but, at the same time, it comes
along with
Linking Words
 several drawbacks. Those in support of raising petrol prices argue that it contributes to mitigating air pollution by indirectly cutting down harmful emissions released by the burning of fossil
fuel
Use synonyms
 to power motor vehicles.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, drivers will deliberately find ways of reducing their
fuel
Use synonyms
consumed
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
 in response to the added expense. In fact, some simple solutions
such
Linking Words
 as carpooling, driving with a steady and average speed or avoiding traffic jams can help gain
fuel
Use synonyms
 savings.
In addition
Linking Words
, the high cost of petrol will promote the use of sustainable transportation alternatives which are environmentally friendly. Indeed, more people will commute by public transport, bicycle or even by foot to avoid paying a great deal of money for fossil
fuel
Use synonyms
 and
this
Linking Words
, at the same time, can be a part of environmental conservation. In spite of the above arguments, I support the view that the rise in
fuel
Use synonyms
 costs will cause more harm than good.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 change could impose financial strain on people who strongly rely on private vehicles. In Vietnam,
for instance
Linking Words
, the motorcycle is irreplaceable because it best suits the narrow road which is inaccessible for public transport, so elevated
fuel
Use synonyms
 prices will be a heavy burden on low-income citizens.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 policy can increase the cost of transporting goods and services, and
as a result
Linking Words
, put pressure on inflationary. In
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
 term, the economy will be at risk of recession since the
overall
Linking Words
 rate of price will be accelerating
while
Linking Words
 the average income remains unchanged. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 a rise in petrol prices can tackle a small part of the environmental issues, the government have to give careful
considerations
Fix the agreement mistake
consideration
show examples
 to its adoption because of the severe implications it can have on the economy.
Submitted by phanhuyhoang278 on

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Task Achievement
Make sure to address all aspects of the prompt and provide a clear opinion. Expand your ideas further by providing additional reasons and examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Connect ideas coherently using appropriate transition words and phrases.
Lexical Resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas. Look for synonyms and more specific terms.
Grammatical Range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. Make sure your sentences are grammatically accurate and varied.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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