In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is it? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

As technology is growing
up
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,
companies
are trying to advertise their
products
in a sensational way, and it is crucial that they emphasize that their
products
are new and better compared to other
companies
. In my opinion,
this
sort of competition in the advertising industry is a positive development and a healthy way to grow
up
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the company. Advertising pros of their
products
play a key role in the business world. A ton of merchandise is coming out every single day. And
this
kind of development can help a competitive
product
come out.
For instance
, Samsung and
Apple
are in a rival relationship, and people always compare those two
companies
'
products
. And
this
competition helps improve their
product
and
advertisement
. To sell their
products
more than rivals,
companies
are always trying to make more vivid, rich, and competitive advertising to emphasise their merchandise. And proper advertising increases their
profit
. The second reason why I think that
advertisement
that emphasizes their
product
has a positive side is that the advertising makes the image of the
product
and company.
Also
, it can enhance their
profit
.
For example
,
Apple
always emphasises their
products
,
such
as the iPhone,
Apple
Watch, and iMac. Despite the high pricing, people don't hesitate to purchase it. Of course, some people think it is an exaggeration
advertisement
. But still, it makes money for
Apple
from now on.
Therefore
, advertisements can improve their
profit
. In conclusion, many
companies
should be adapting the
advertisement
in a proper way to improve their
profit
. For those reasons, I believe that advertisements that emphasize their
products
are a positive development of
this
industry.
Submitted by oyj1798 on

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Task Response
Try to improve sentence structure and grammar for a more polished presentation. A few errors are noticeable but don't deter understanding.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to ensure ideas connect smoothly. A clearer logical progression between ideas will enhance the reader's understanding.
Task Response
Expand on individual points with more specific, detailed examples and explanations. This further supports the main argument and shows a sophisticated grasp of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the main argument.
Task Response
Good use of relevant examples such as the comparison between Samsung and Apple to support points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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