Some people believe that children should attend extra classes after school while some disagree. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.

Over the years, extra
lessons
has
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have
show examples
become popular, It is debatable whether a child should go for
lessons
after
school
or not. There are
pro
Fix the agreement mistake
pros
show examples
and cons for both sides. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will outline the benefits and drawbacks
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
extra classes. On one hand, it is highly beneficial for pupils to go for extra
lessons
after
school
,
this
is because teachers do not cover everything in
school
as they follow the syllabus from
Add an article
the department
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department
Capitalize word
Department
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of
education
Capitalize word
Education
show examples
, there is
also
limited time
Secondly
, it is more rewarding to go for
lessons
as one will receive personalised attention or service. There is a small group compared to the one from
school
and at
school
it can be difficult for all students to get the
teachers
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teacher's
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attention,
also
If there
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
something which was unclear at
school
your private tutor will help you with that, they can
also
quickly notice the areas you struggle with.
On the other hand
, it is unnecessary for pupils to go sit for other
lessons
,
this
promotes laziness, students should be able to study what they learnt at
school
on their own. They have to put in extra effort
,
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apply
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and learn to be independent.
Furthermore
, the costs will be too much for the parents or guardian
To conclude
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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this
, I believe a child's potential should determine if they should go for extra classes or not, some kids are smart
however
there are some kids who need help so that they achieve the desired grades at
school
Submitted by chikashabetty on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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