Music play an important role in society, others think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#music #role #society #form #entertainment #individuals

Music

has long been a significant aspect of society, with opinions varying on its role.

While

some argue that

music

is merely a form of

entertainment

for individuals, others contend that its impact goes far beyond mere amusement.

This

essay will explore both perspectives and argue that

music

can profoundly influence individuals' lives, transcending its part as mere

entertainment

. Those who view

music

as a form of

entertainment

emphasize

music

serves as a source of relaxation, enjoyment, and escape from the pressures of daily life. It clearly showed that so many people are into attending a concert despite the price of the concert itself,

for example

, it costs more than USD 425 for a well-known international star like Taylor Swift or Coldplay. People see it as a real bargain considering the experience they

got

Verb problem

have

show examples

On the other hand

music

plays a much deeper act in society than mere

entertainment

. It has the power to evoke strong emotions and express complex feelings that words alone cannot convey. For many individuals,

music

serves as a coping mechanism during challenging times. To illustrate, BTS

music

has proven to save many fans’ lives. BTS become one example that

music

has other roles with socially relevant messages, their

music

has sparked social change and inspired movements among their fans (ARMY), making it an influential force for societal transformation. Beyond its immediate

entertainment

value,

music

has the potential to change someone's life trajectory. For some,

music

serves as a catalyst for personal growth, fostering discipline, teamwork, and self-expression.

Therefore

music

's ability to shape lives and offer a sense of purpose suggests that it extends far beyond the realm of

entertainment

. In conclusion,

while

some perceive

music

solely as a source of amusement, it is evident that its role in society is multifaceted.

Submitted by saynah_ on Sun Nov 05 2023

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grammatical range

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

296 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural tool
shared identity
cognitive development
creativity
mental health
music therapy
chronic pain
entertainment value
personal escape
cultural background

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Music play an important role in society, others think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In certain countries, unemployment is so high that some have suggested children should stop their education after primary school to learn skills necessary to join the workforce. Do you agree or disagree?

In the future, nobody will buy printed paper or books because they will becomplete able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you ag ree or disagree?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that in many cities around the world there are constant traffic jams. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from owning cars?

Nowadays, many people prefer to seek medical advice on the Internet instead of seeing a qualified doctor. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or a negative development?

It is important for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweuigh the disadvatages ?