IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

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In today's world, many societies in several countries are eager to look for
information
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 related to the
house
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 or building that they plan to live in. I believe all
people
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 are curious about
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 story of their
house
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 in the past.
Therefore
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, I will examine the root causes of why it becomes appealing to some human civilization. The history behind a
house
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 or building can give a sense of self-satisfaction.
This
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 is why
people
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, especially those who live in a
house
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 that was built many years ago, are often interested in finding out more about the history.
For instance
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, a family who intends to buy an old
house
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 conducts a survey of how the building was constructed in the past. It's preventive actions to avoid unwanted accidents
such
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 as the building suddenly collapsing. The advancement of technology has enabled
people
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 to search for
information
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 through
Internet
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the Internet
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. They can open the website to get in contact with the previous owner in order to get detailed
information
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 related to the
house
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.
For instance
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, there are many applications and websites that store data about houses in Indonesia. The other method is
people
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 can ask senior citizens who have been living there for quite a
while
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. In conclusion, it is very crucial to know the history of houses or buildings before we buy them. The rapid technology has made everything easier in looking for the
information
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.
However
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, it is
also
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 necessary to ask the neighbourhood about the story of the houses, it might lead
people
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 to know more about the hidden stories of the buildings that they will live in.

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Task Response
Even though you provided specific examples for your arguments, there seems to be a lack of in-depth exploration of these examples. Elaboration on the examples would enrich your essay and provide a complete response to the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
Overall, your essay has a clear structure and it flows naturally from one point to the next. The introduction and conclusion are present and well-articulated. However, there were minor issues with transitioning between some thoughts which affected the fluency of your writing slightly.
Lexical Resource
Your vocabulary is varied and impressive which enhances the quality of your work. Nonetheless, appropriate usage of these terms would undoubtedly increase the effectiveness of your writing. Familiarize yourself with how to incorporate these bold terms smoothly within your sentences.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
You demonstrate a good range and control of grammatical structures and tenses. However, some sentences could be more concise to bring across your point more directly. Practise trimming down your sentences while still maintaining their complex nature.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Historical research
  • Genealogy
  • Architectural styles
  • Heritage
  • Relics
  • Oral history
  • Archival records
  • Museum exhibits
  • Historical societies
  • House tours
  • Renovation projects
  • Original blueprints
  • Careful documentation
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