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Band 6.5

Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish.Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country
Although
 it is thought by some that doctors and engineers ought to be restricted to
work
 in the same
country
 they have already been trained in, others believe that these specialists should be given the freedom to opt for their
career
 future. From my point of view, I strongly believe that every individual desires liberty in terms of deciding whether to
work
 in his/her home
country
 or abroad. There are a few reasons why some individuals insist on restricting professionals from working in the
country
 where they have already studied. Supposedly, experts who are born in developing or underdeveloped
countries
 have been experiencing intolerable working conditions
as well as
 being paid living wages. In simpler terms, they believe that had they been born in a developed
country
 with better life standards, they would have prospered and been given more opportunities in either their private or professional lives. The more specialists decide to immigrate to other
countries
, the more the government feels threatened as it is losing its national capital.
Thus
, it would be looking forward to imposing new laws against His trend.
Nevertheless
, I believe that
career
 liberty should be considered
as
Change preposition
apply
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a human right, regardless of a person's education or training
country
.
In other words
, if the choice is left to the professionals, they would determine where to
work
.
Consequently
,
this
 liberty of choice results in the efficient performance of doctors and engineers as they are motivated and more optimistic about their future.
Finally
, a
country
 with professional workers who have personally opted for their
career
 path will witness significant development in various aspects. In conclusion,
while
 some people believe that these are the
countries
 which should put restrictions on professionals'
career
 paths, I strongly believe that having the opportunity to choose where to
work
 can bring about more dedication, prosperity and development for the
countries
Submitted by parvizrashidi on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a logical structure, with an introduction and conclusion, but could benefit from more varied linking words and clearer paragraphing to enhance readability.
task achievement
You address the task, providing a clear response with comprehensive ideas. However, including specific examples to support each point would enrich your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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