IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Today, many people do not know their neighbors in large city. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

#people #neighbors #city
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
 day and age, there are numerous
people
Use synonyms
 who do not connect and interact with their
neighbours
Use synonyms
 in large urban areas.
This
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 leads to feelings of isolation and loneliness and
also
Linking Words
 can be a safety issue when they get emergencies or crimes. The measure for
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 is that
people
Use synonyms
 can plan a ceremony to celebrate these special events together.
People
Use synonyms
 nowadays are occupied with their work and studying so they do not have time to care about their
neighbours
Use synonyms
,
in other words
Linking Words
, they do not have time to interact and express their feelings with their
neighbours
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, not knowing one’s
neighbours
Use synonyms
 can contribute to feelings of isolation and loneliness when
people
Use synonyms
 do not have a sense of community or support system close to home it can negatively impact their mental well-being.
For instance
Linking Words
, the investigation of one US university reveals that
people
Use synonyms
 tend to feel alone lonely and isolated if they do not have anyone to make friends and interact with them. Not knowing
neighbours
Use synonyms
 can be a safety issue. In times of emergencies or crimes, having a network of familiar faces nearby can be crucial. It is true to admit that without these connections individuals may feel less secure. Take the hurricane in the Middle of Vietnam as an example, it is obvious that
neighbours
Use synonyms
 might be vital sources when it attacked the dwellers
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
here,
neighbours
Use synonyms
 can exchange their food, and beverages, and lend their hands to others if they need assistance to go through with the bad cases. The focal solution to
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 is that
people
Use synonyms
 could plan a ceremony to celebrate these special events together.
For example
Linking Words
, they can celebrate some events to make the distance between
people
Use synonyms
 with
people
Use synonyms
 closer and they might have good accompaniments with them.
Moreover
Linking Words
, families who have children would let them play with each other to strike a friendship
instead
Linking Words
 of allowing children to sit in front of their computers all day long. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 can lead to an insensitive society, from that there is no one who feels reliable on each other and social problems will increase more.
Therefore
Linking Words
, we need to make their bonds stronger by utilizing some measures which I mentioned above.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that the ideas directly address the task question and avoid irrelevant information. Include clear topic sentences and support them with relevant examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating a logical and organized structure throughout the essay. Use cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs more effectively.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary to include a wider range of words and idiomatic expressions. Use more precise and varied language to convey your ideas.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and accuracy. Use a variety of sentence types and grammatical structures. Check for subject-verb agreement and punctuation errors.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: