IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The bar charts below give information on the road transport in a number of European countries.

The bar charts below give information on the road transport in a number of European countries.
#bar #information #road #transport #european #countries
The diagram illustrates information on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
road transportation in a few European countries. Regarding the
first
 bar
chart
, Denmark has the
first
place
 at just above 12000
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 per
year
 and it is closely followed by France. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, Germany and Spain have almost
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 number of
km
 per
year
 and they are in the
last
 position.
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 the end, Italy and United hold the middle
place
 in the ranking.
Also
, the average value is about 10000. In regard
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 second
chart
 which is about travel per person
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 bus, train, metro and bike, Denmark is in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
first
place
 by far from the other countries. Unlike Denmark,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom and France hold the
last
place
.
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 the end, the average value is just over 1000 per unit.
Overall
,
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
 of
km
 per
year
 in the second
chart
 is much less than the
first
 one and the highest in the second
chart
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was 3000
km
 per
year
although
 the highest was more than 12000
km
 per
year
 for the
first
hart
Correct your spelling
chart
show examples
.
Submitted by parsahassani077 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end, last".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words first, chart, place, year, km with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • volume of road transport
  • economic activity
  • population density
  • infrastructure quality
  • traffic congestion
  • environmental pollution
  • road safety
  • policies or measures
  • public transport
  • road improvements
  • emissions regulations
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!