These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

In the
last
few
decades
Add a comma
decades,
show examples
there has been a significant increase in the number of opportunities for international travel, with more transport routes and cheaper fares. There are undoubtedly benefits flowing from
this
growth in international tourism. People now have a greater awareness of other cultures than was the case even one generation ago. Travelling widely to enjoy
such
things as the art, customs and cuisine of different countries used to be the preserve of the wealthy classes. Now even the less well-off have access to them. There are,
however
, drawbacks associated with
this
level of mobility.
Firstly
, a number of resorts, even whole countries, have so many
tourists
that the culture and environment are severely damaged.
For example
, traditional crafts are replaced by the manufacturing of cheap trinkets and local singing and dancing are packaged for tourist consumption. Because
tourists
stay for only a short time they often don't care if they behave badly or litter the streets.
Secondly
,
although
the hospitality industry does bring employment, it tends to be precarious because much of it is seasonal, with long periods of the year offering no work. The income from tourism is unevenly distributed, with a small number of big businesses (e.g. property developers) making a lot of money but the majority of people
working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
for low wages as waiters or guides. Related to
this
is the fact that money spent by
tourists
is seldom retained by the local economy:
profits
Correct word choice
and profits
show examples
are frequently taken out by multinational corporations.
Finally
, international travel adds to greenhouse gases, leading to harmful climate change. In my view, despite the advantages of travel to both
tourists
and host countries, these do not compensate for the damage inflicted on the environment, social structures and individuals by mass tourism.
Submitted by gloriasherin on

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Structure
Continue to use a clear and logical structure in your essays, ensuring that each main point is effectively introduced and concluded. This enhances readability and allows your argument to flow more naturally.
Examples
Incorporate specific examples to support your arguments more extensively. While general examples have been effectively used, adding more specific and varied illustrations can enhance the depth of your analysis and the persuasive power of your essay.
Balance
Consider exploring both sides of the argument more evenly, ensuring that the advantages and disadvantages receive equal consideration before presenting your conclusion. This balanced approach can make your argument more compelling and nuanced.
Comprehensiveness
The essay effectively provides a comprehensive overview of the topic, presenting both advantages and disadvantages of the increase in international travel.
Language Use
There is an excellent use of language to articulate points clearly and persuasively, making the argument accessible and engaging to the reader.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments made throughout the essay, providing a clear and thought-out stance on the issue.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • boost local economies
  • cultural exchange
  • mutual understanding
  • environmental degradation
  • deforestation
  • overcrowding
  • commodification
  • authentic cultural experiences
  • revenue
  • perspective
  • globalization
  • sustainable tourism
  • heritage sites
  • local customs
  • appreciation of diversity
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