IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now.

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now.
#floor #plan #library #years
The diagrams illustrate the changes of Central Library from 20 years ago until
present
Add an article
the present
show examples
 day.
Overall
, there has been
a significant changes
Correct the article-noun agreement
a significant change
significant changes
show examples
 in the facilities and the size of some rooms has expanded.
To begin
 with, 20 years ago, the first
room
 on the right side from the entrance was used for enquiry for tickets, book returns, etc. In the present day, the
room
 is replaced with the Cafe. The
room
 that
previously
Add a missing verb
was previously
show examples
 used for children's
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
 is replaced
into
Change preposition
with
show examples
Correct article usage
a
show examples
lecture
room
.
In addition
, the space between
children's
Correct article usage
the children's
show examples
books
room
 and
enquiry
Correct article usage
the enquiry
show examples
room
 that was previously used for adult non-fiction
books
 is replaced by
information
Correct article usage
an information
show examples
 desk with three self-service machines and a number of adult fiction
books
. On the left side from the entrance, the reading
room
 (newspapers & magazines) was demolished and now is used
for
Change preposition
as
show examples
computer
Add an article
the computer
a computer
show examples
room
. The
room
 at the back that was used for CDs, videos, and computer games was expanded and now is used for
story telling
Correct your spelling
storytelling
show examples
 events with two sofas and children's fiction
books
. The space in between that was previously used for adult fiction
books
 is replaced by all reference
books
.
In addition
, tables and chairs at the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of the library
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 now removed.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words room, books with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "present" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • floor plan
  • layout
  • shelving
  • reading area
  • reference section
  • encyclopedias
  • dictionaries
  • circulation desk
  • transactions
  • digital media
  • computer stations
  • multimedia rooms
  • café area
  • social environment
  • leisure-friendly
  • expanded reading areas
  • user experience
  • comfortable seating
  • children's section
  • engage younger readers
What to do next:
Look at other essays: