IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In recent years, young people in many countries have chosen to live by themselves. What are the reasons and is it a positive or negative for the development of society?

#years #people #countries #development #society
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times, many young generations in the world prefer to live separately from their parents. I believe it has
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
 positive impact and
this
Linking Words
 essay will explain the causes of
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the most reason is because young people need more private space for themselves. It makes them free
for doing
Change preposition
to do
show examples
 their hobbies
such
Linking Words
 as reading books, playing music, or even doing sports regularly.
However
Linking Words
, if they live with their family, they will be disturbed frequently, preventing them from enjoying their time.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, some individuals fail to get along well with their family members.
For instance
Linking Words
, many children in a family
feeling
Wrong verb form
feel
show examples
 uncomfortable
to tell
Change the verb form
telling
show examples
 their
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their parents and prefer to share their
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with their friends. It can cause
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 lack of communication between them. Some parents are
also
Linking Words
 judging the lifestyle of their children and it makes the younger generation tend to move out and live by themselves.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the increasing number of
this
Linking Words
 trend can be beneficial from personal life perspectives. When living alone, they learn to manage their household and professional workload at the same time.
For example
Linking Words
, They have to cook food, wash clothes and do all other household
while
Linking Words
 pursuing a job or studies. People who are willing to live alone in large cities can explore better job opportunities, which is simply because they can move around anywhere and anytime. In conclusion, young people can take the positive impact from
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon
such
Linking Words
 as personal growth and it can make them more independent.
Submitted by hafizahnazir on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs are well-organized and that ideas flow logically from one to the other. Use a range of cohesive devices appropriately.
Coherence and Cohesion
Provide clear main ideas in each paragraph and develop them fully. Use a range of linking words to help connect ideas and make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
Task Achievement
Thoroughly respond to all parts of the task. Make sure your position is relevant and clear, and that you provide specific examples to support your ideas.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: