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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Do you think it is better for students to work before their university studies? Why? Use reasons and specific examples to support your choice.

#students #work #university #studies #support #choice
In my opinion, it is appreciated for
students
 to work before enrolling in
university
. There are many benefits to doing it. I will discuss my mentality in
this
 essay.
Firstly
, one reason
supports
Correct pronoun usage
that supports
show examples
 the idea is the increasing skill and experience of the
students
 who work prior to beginning in the
university
.
For example
, a
student
 who is enrolled in a pedagogical
university
 and
opt
Correct subject-verb agreement
opts
show examples
 for an internship in a primary school. In
this
 period, the
student
 becomes aware of what it takes to become a teacher and picks up some set skills
such
 as how to face bad news , impart knowledge , and especially presentations to the crowd .
Furthermore
, preparing for lessons is mandatory for every teacher.
Also
, it helps build up the planned working style not only in jobs but
also
 in studies.
Additionally
, it enables the
student
 to set up more chances in the future.
Secondly
, it helps to develop emotion and money management skills. In the former, teaching a willful
student
 is not easy to control temper , so the intern increasingly keeps calm and learns how to get rid of negative energy. In the latter, some of the jobs taken up by the
students
 have low-paid salaries which may not be enough to cover all expenses. Particularly, for those who are dependent, it plays an important role
to have
Change preposition
in having
show examples
 a reasonable division of income.
Hence
this
 teaches them how to save money and have smart spending. In conclusion, I believe there is no harm if
students
 work before starting at the
university
. It’s a time for them to gain experience and expand
knowledge
Correct pronoun usage
their knowledge
show examples
 and
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.
Submitted by ntl250605 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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