It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

In our rapidly evolving world,
individuals
are frequently faced with the prospect of taking
risks
in various aspects of their lives. There is an ongoing debate regarding the significance of embracing
risks
in both professional and personal spheres. Despite the potential downsides, I firmly contend that the benefits associated with taking
risks
are substantially more significant. Engaging in risk-taking
behaviors
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behaviours
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offers several noteworthy advantages. By taking
risks
,
individuals
may have the opportunity to secure better job prospects, gain valuable experience, and be exposed to new environments.
Moreover
, the act of taking
risks
often leads to a sense of
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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, as it reflects a genuine
willingness
to step out of one's comfort zone.
While
it is possible to incur losses, the invaluable experiences gained can contribute to personal growth and the development of resilience. In the context of the modern technological age, the
willingness
to take
risks
sets
individuals
apart from artificial intelligence and robots, demonstrating the uniquely human capacity for bold decision-making.
Furthermore
,
individuals
who take
risks
often find themselves in a more competitive position, which can lead to greater professional success. Throughout history, the progress of humankind has been propelled by the
willingness
to undertake
risks
, from the earliest days of human civilization to the present.
Nevertheless
, it is important to acknowledge that taking
risks
is not without its drawbacks. Potential disadvantages include the investment of time and the possibility of experiencing self-doubt. It is often the case that without risk, there can be no substantial achievement, as
individuals
who shy away from taking
risks
may limit their potential for success and personal growth.
Such
risk-averse
individuals
may find themselves leading unfulfilled lives and becoming enslaved by consumerist tendencies. Ultimately, the reluctance to embrace
risks
can lead to a loss of competitiveness and hinder personal and professional progress.
While
it is natural for
individuals
to
harbor
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harbour
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apprehensions about the uncertainties that accompany risk-taking, succumbing to these fears deprives them of the opportunity to lead truly fulfilling lives. In conclusion, in our contemporary society, the
willingness
to take
risks
is an essential quality that permeates all domains of life, be it personal or professional. It is
this
very
willingness
to take
risks
that often determines an individual's trajectory in life.
Therefore
, I am of the opinion that the advantages of taking
risks
far outweigh the potential drawbacks. By confronting challenges and uncertainties head-on,
individuals
can position themselves for greater personal and professional
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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.
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively outlines your view and summarises the main points. However, it would benefit from more cohesive devices to help the essay flow more naturally.
task achievement
You have addressed the task prompt comprehensively, expressing a clear position throughout your essay. It would be improved by expanding on the specific examples to support your arguments -- consider including more illustrative anecdotes or data to really solidify your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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