Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn teamwork. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is said that exercising can let kids realize the concept of competition, but some

people

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also

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argue that it is cooperation that kids learn more from exercise. In my opinion, even though

teamwork

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plays an important role in

sports

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, I consider that the motivation to be competitive outweighs

teamwork

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. It is obvious that

children

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can learn how to be involved in a competition in sport. Unlike academic exams which

people

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can not see where their opponents are and how they demonstrate their abilities, physical contests need

people

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to perform in person.

This

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is a great circumstance that simulates

children

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's willingness to fight and encourages them to do their best to win. In the

sports

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class in the elementary school, we can see some students try hard to win in various types of

sports

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such

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as dodgeball, basketball and running. They are learning to become little athletes from normal students.

Sports

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can let

children

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understand the value of cooperation too, but the effects are relatively small. Indeed, some sort of

sports

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require team members to join.

For example

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, volleyball needs six

people

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on the court to receive, set, and spike the ball separately. Being cooperative with teammates can give you more chances to win

instead

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of fighting alone.

However

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, not every sport requires

teamwork

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. Marathon,

for instance

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, is a kind of sport that competes with other players but does all the challenges by himself or herself. It is the quest for an individual's physical and mental limitations without

teamwork

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. To be honest, the only thing those athletes put in mind

while

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exercising is the ambition of chasing the win and fighting against other competitors. In conclusion, I think

sports

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let

children

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know more about the essence of being ambitious and competitive for glory,

instead

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of learning the spirit of

teamwork

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yitsen210134Fri Dec 15 2023

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coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates a good attempt at a logical structure, however, it would benefit from a more consistent flow of ideas and better signaling of your arguments transitions to guide the reader through your points more effectively.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion of the essay are present, but could be enhanced by more clearly stating the thesis in the introduction and summarizing the main points in the conclusion.

coherence cohesion

The main points are supported, but your arguments could be strengthened with more varied and detailed examples, as well as a broader range of sentence structures to enhance clarity and engagement.

task achievement

Your response to the prompt is adequate, but there's room to expand on both views more comprehensively and to provide a more nuanced argument that reflects an understanding of both sides before making a conclusion.

task achievement

Ideas are clear but at times not fully developed. Aim to provide a more comprehensive exploration of the topic by expanding on ideas and integrating a wider range of perspectives.

task achievement

The use of relevant and specific examples is somewhat limited. Including more instances and evidence from real-life situations would add depth to your argument and illustrate your points more convincingly.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

competition
teamwork
individual sports
team sports
perseverance
resilience
goals
support
responsibilities
social bonds
community
communicate
trust
group effort
balanced perspective
well-rounded skill set

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Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn teamwork. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?

The unlimited use of cars may cause problems. What are those problems? In order to reduce the problems, should we discourage people to use cars? Give a reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Many people around the world use social media to keep in touch with other people and get the news. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The rise of social media platforms has made it easier for people to vent their frustrations and complaints publicly.What is the consequence of this trend? Is there any benefit to expressing complaints on social media

Some young people are leaving the countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in the countryside. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?