Some people believe that boarding schools are an excellent option for children, while others disagree. Consider both sides and conclude.
The importance of sending children to boarding schools which was always debatable has now become more controversial with many people claiming that it is beneficial
while
others reject this
notion. The substantial influence of this
trend has sparked controversy over its potential impact in recent years. This
essay will elaborate on both the positives and negatives of this
trend and thus
will lead to a logical conclusion.
There are myriad benefits of sending learners to boarding schools but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that it makes them independent and self-reliant. They learn discipline, cooperation and teamwork at the boarding. Another pivotal advantage is that they learn to deal with students from multicultural backgrounds. Moreover
, they live in an academic and peaceful environment which helps them to gain academic qualifications and enhance confidence.
However
, there are some pitfalls that negate these arguments but the most alarming one is that they might feel homesick or isolated as it does not give emotional satisfaction to a child. Besides
, the family gap increases. There is less social interaction with the outside world. Also
, they might get involved in bad company as there is no parental guidance. In addition
, parents will have no way of knowing what is happening in their children's daily lives. Hence
, it is apparent why many are against this
trend.
To recapitulate, according to
the arguments aforementioned above, one can conclude that the advantages of boarding schools for children are instrumental indeed. Nevertheless
, its potential drawbacks should not be overlooked either.Submitted by jagdeepsingh3699 on
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coherence cohesion
Your introduction sets a clear topic and suggests that both sides of the argument will be presented, which is appropriate for the task. Moving from a general introduction to specific details will enhance the logical flow.
coherence cohesion
You should aim to have a clear central topic per paragraph. Some paragraphs in your essay mix advantages and disadvantages without clear separation. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, supported by details, examples, or arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion is present, summarizing the points made, but it should also clearly state your personal stance to fulfill the prompt's requirement to conclude. Your conclusion could be more distinct by clearly stating your final opinion, after weighing both sides of the argument.
task achievement
You have addressed the task, but the response could be more complete by demonstrating a thorough comparison and contrast between the two views. Your essay would benefit from more detailed development of each point of view, showing a more balanced discussion.
task achievement
Ideas in your essay are generally clear and related to the topic, but they could be more comprehensive. Develop your ideas further with more detailed explanations or examples to effectively demonstrate your understanding of the subject matter.
task achievement
Your essay lacks specific examples to support your main points, which would help strengthen your arguments. Including cases or research findings could substantiate your claims, and enhance the reader's understanding of your position.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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