Young people are often influenced in their behaviours and situations by others in the same age. This is called “peer pressure”. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

In modern society , associated
stress
become an increasingly important issue with students or those who are studying and working . They are compared and influenced by people of the same site, same ability or location, the same group in society is believed to be more successful.
This
situation does indeed cause certain negative effects, but in my view, they will be overshadowed by an optimistic side . There are many reasons why associate
stress
is not a very positive thing . Depending on each person's age and personality, associate
stress
also
manifests itself differently. Expressions of associated
stress
can be positive or negative. With regard to the negative side ,
stress
and influence from our peers cause us to conform as a way to fit into the social group and our family . The
stress
from the comparison of our scores at school makes us feel depressed and prone to failure.
Additionally
, leads to depression, always feeling anxious and pressured when around excellent people . Because we want to show that we are not inferior to others and easily agitated when provoked by someone .
Due to
the imposed expectations from society and those around them losing self-confidence and self-esteem when having to race after others with a different frame of reference . Meanwhile , It is beneficial for individuals when colleagues or friends encourage them to do something positive or push them to grow. Another key is healthy competition will help them be more motivated to act and achieve the desired results . It brings motivates us to study harder, achieve higher scores, and progress at work . That can be a role model for us to strive and improve and there is a saying
that is
often used in business: "No pressure, no diamonds".
This
means that the strain from the success of those around you makes you work harder and try harder to become a person like your friends. In conclusion , any problem usually has both positive and negative sides,
this
depends on how we ourselves perceive and solve it. associate strength can be the push that creates the motivation to push you higher, but at the same time, it can
also
push you down to the abyss of despair.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that you have a clear and strong main idea that addresses the prompt question directly and that each paragraph develops a single main point.
task achievement
Work on expanding and explaining your examples more fully. This includes providing more specific details and showing how the examples support your arguments regarding the advantages and disadvantages of peer pressure.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by clearly outlining your essay with an introduction that includes a thesis statement, followed by body paragraphs that each focus on a single idea, and a conclusion that summarises the essay and restates your main points.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices (e.g., conjunctions, lexical phrases) to link ideas and paragraphs. However, make sure they are used correctly and that they enhance the flow of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: