It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is often argued that taking
risk
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risks
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is essential for personal
life
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as well as
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professional career and individuals consider it for making changes not only in their own lives but
also
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in society. There are pros and
crons
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cons
for
this
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issue.
However
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, by weighing both sides of the argument, I believe that it has more positive than negative outcomes. In our modern world, everybody tends to live
life
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to the full and a major factor
for
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in
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achieving
this
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goal is the ability
of taking
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to take
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risk
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risks
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in varied situations. In
this
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way, it is expected to improve if you
could
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can
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make a good decision and manage your
works
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work
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.
For instance
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,when you face a new job opportunity with
higher
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a higher
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income
while
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your global condition at
workplace
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the workplace
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is nearly satisfying, it would be a risky choice to change it
although
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it may result in promotion and improvement. The other benefit is for
youngesters
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youngsters
who enjoy living
life
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on the edge and
this
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will assist them to find more personal
fulfillment
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fulfilment
show examples
. They are likely to be enthusiastic
in
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about
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new experiences so taking
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a risk
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risk
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risks
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not only is interesting for them but
also
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can
counterbute
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contribute
to their progress.
On the other hand
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, people who change their permanent
career
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careers
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recklessnessly
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recklessly
are more in danger of facing financial problems as they are not able to earn money regularly.
This
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can affect their personal
life
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and may cause anxiety.
However
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, mature individuals consider all the conditions and can predict the consequences of their decision clearly so it is not expected to result in disaster
due to
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the variety of choices that they have.
To conclude
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, in my perspective, As risk-takers are into novel experiences, they may be more successful and pleased in their lives but distinguishing the effective changes and making beneficial
decision
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decisions
show examples
is necessary.
Submitted by s.hemmati.p on

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structure
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction and conclusion were present but not fully developed.
coherence
Work on linking your ideas more cohesively. Use a range of connecting words and phrases to help the reader follow your argument.
examples
Support your main points with more specific examples. While you have provided some examples, they could be more detailed to better illustrate your points.
task response
Ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task. While you have offered some argument on the advantages and disadvantages of risk-taking, more depth and detail would improve the task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
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