There are those who consider work to be the paramount aspect of life, suggesting that without career success, life loses its meaning. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is true that work has a vital role to play in one's

life

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Therefore

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, some people harbour a belief that

life

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will become meaningless without succeeding in jobs, whilst others hold the reverse viewpoint. As people are prone to gaining a sense of accomplishment from jobs, I am inclined to stand with the statement that success in a career will make

life

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meaningful.

Initially

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, one of the main arguments in favour of the connection between jobs and

life

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meaning is that individuals need ambition for

life

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Thus

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, they should have goals to achieve ,

otherwise

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life

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will turn out to be tedious when someone lives without purpose.

For instance

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, there are many elderly who feel depressed after retirement since they do not know what to do which even results in accelerated ageing.

Hence

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, work indeed influences one's

life

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to a certain degree. At the other end of the spectrum, job achievements will raise one’s self-esteem when a person earns recognition from it.

For example

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, a teacher who engages in teaching and cares about students may be satisfied to see students’ improvement.

Moreover

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, when someone finds a job that he/she truly loves, the considerable change can be

life

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-long

due to

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the enhancement of self-values.

Hence

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, career success indeed will elevate the meaning of

life

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To sum up

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, despite the fact that work is only a part of

life

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, its significant effects cannot be denied. The most important thing is how people gain personal growth and a sense of achievement from it.

Therefore

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, career progress is considerably associated with

life

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values.

s99104032Tue Jan 02 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your essay shows a good level of coherence, with logical sequencing of ideas and a clear overall progression. However, the connections between some of the main points and examples could be strengthened. Make sure that each paragraph flows seamlessly into the next by using a wider range of cohesive devices and more nuanced topic sentences that link back to the thesis more explicitly.

task achievement

While you have provided an essay that addresses the task with clear ideas, it would benefit from development through more specific and varied examples. Offering unique, detailed instances or case studies associated with the topic at hand could improve the 'relevant specific examples' aspect. Broadening the scope of your argument to capture a diversity of perspectives can also enhance completeness.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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There are those who consider work to be the paramount aspect of life, suggesting that without career success, life loses its meaning. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs ( for example, working for charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to the younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually empahise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweight the disadvantages?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. [545]

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and wether they are married or single some people say that this information may be relavant and useful.Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your openion.