Many people choose to work or live abroad because of the higher standards of living they can find outside their home country. Do you think this brings more advantages or disadvantages to the people who follow this path?

#people #work #standards #home #country #path

lots of

people

decide to

immigrate

to a foreign

country

as they believe they can have better lives there rather than

their

Change preposition

in their

show examples

own region. I subscribe to

this

idea. Analyzing having more safety and getting better salaries will support

this

argument.

Firstly

People

usually prefer to live in a safe

country

in order to have

stressless

Correct your spelling

stress-free

show examples

lives.

For

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

it can be seen that

people

from countries which

involve

Wrong verb form

involved

show examples

in wars or high

rate

Fix the agreement mistake

rates

show examples

street-crime

Correct your spelling

street crime

show examples

immigrate

to more

peacfull

Correct your spelling

peaceful

regions. It can help them to provide more efficient lives for

theirselves

Correct your spelling

themselves

show examples

and their families.

Thus

, immigrating can help improve

people have more

Verb problem

people's

show examples

safety.

Secondly

people

from poor countries tend to

immigrate

to richer countries to increase their income as their revenue does not meet their needs in their own

country

For example

, every year a lot of

people

immigrate

germany

Change the capitalization

Germany

show examples

because of its job opportunities and its high income. They will have better

purchusing

Correct your spelling

purchasing

power of life.

Therefore

, immigrating to a developed

country

can result

making

Change preposition

in making

show examples

more money and

have

Wrong verb form

having

show examples

a more quality life.

To conclude

immigruting

Correct your spelling

immigrating

to a foreign

country

can help

people

having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

more safety and better income. So it can be a good way to provide a more

sutisfiying

Correct your spelling

satisfying

life.

Submitted by m.momeni1010 on Wed Jan 03 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and your viewpoint. Reflect on utilizing varied sentence structures and transitions for smooth progression of ideas which will enhance coherence.

task achievement

Try to fully address all parts of the task, including stating if there are more advantages or disadvantages. Expand your examples to be more specific and detailed which will demonstrate the ability to discuss ideas at length and enhance task achievement.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

205 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
InMore and more people could now access information from computers and other electronic devices. Therefore, there is no need to use printed books, magazines, or newspapers on paper. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the past, Letters and Newspapers are vital for sending information. Entertainments were usually on television such as football games, television dramas and reality shows. Moreover, students had to prepare books for each day's lessons. Some heavy books were hard to carry to school. That was the reason why studying was very hard.
5
band
ith the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. DO ADV >< DISADV
There is a phenomenon of mechanical workers dominating the workforce. The writer indicates that the drawbacks of increasing unemployment rates is outweighed by the benefit of boosting the productivity and new product creation
4.5
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Other believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification discuss both these views and give your own opinion
The advancement of time and technology requires for students can study to develop themselves, especially the university students. When students enter in the university, of course they chose one major with one compulsory subject and materials related to their discipline. Some students consider focusing on their main subject in order to get a maximum result while getting a qualification for their field. However, other students may have confidence that one of the ways to be able compete with other job candidates is by learning topics in addition to their gist material. I want to discuss both sides of the argument.
<4
band
Write about the following topic: An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowaydays, more and more expert worker like dokters and teachers move for seeking job from their needy country to advanced country. This issue have saveral effect and solution which I will explain in this essay.
8
band
Numerous animal species worldwide are currently facing extinction. Some argue that countries and individuals should prioritize protecting these animals, while others believe resources should be focused more on human issues. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is true that many kinds of animals are encountering survival challenges around the world. Therefore, some people harbour a belief that the conservation issue should be prioritized, whilst others hold the reverse viewpoint that human issues are more important. Since both proportions are equally vital, I am inclined to stand neutrally with the statement. An in-depth discussion as well as my thoughts will be highlighted in the write-up.

Many people choose to work or live abroad because of the higher standards of living they can find outside their home country. Do you think this brings more advantages or disadvantages to the people who follow this path?

Word Count

InMore and more people could now access information from computers and other electronic devices. Therefore, there is no need to use printed books, magazines, or newspapers on paper. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

ith the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. DO ADV >< DISADV

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Other believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Numerous animal species worldwide are currently facing extinction. Some argue that countries and individuals should prioritize protecting these animals, while others believe resources should be focused more on human issues. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.