Some people think that robots are important for humanʼs future development. Others think that robots have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #robots #humanʼs #future #development #effects #society

These days digital technologies are becoming more sophisticated every day.

Hence

, it is argued that

robots

are essential for the growth of society,

while

others believe that they are not necessary, as they are negatively affecting humans and their job positions.

This

essay will explore both viewpoints and provide my opinion in the conclusion. First and foremost, machines are beneficial to many companies as they are more economical than employees.

This

means that once contributing to having

robots

in corporate organisations leads to saving money on paying salaries to labourers.

For example

, many engineering organisations use artificial intelligence for calculation purposes, which causes better progress and immediate results.

Furthermore

, people require rest,

whereas

robots

mechanism can continually operate without any breaks, which positively affects the productivity of the company.

On the other hand

, relying on machines only leads to unemployment and financial instability of particular workers. If occupations are replaced by

robots

, many individuals will lose their jobs, eventually suffering from financial issues.

For instance

, in Australia, in 2022, those who worked in information technology fields, especially engaging in coding, lost their jobs

due to

the introduction of the new artificial intelligence programs, which operate much faster than human beings.

Consequently

, these employees are not able to provide financial support to their families and pay their bills.

Furthermore

, if

robots

take over some jobs,

such

as teachers, therapists and doctors, people will lack emotional support and empathy, as machines simply do not possess these qualities. In conclusion, even though

robots

are beneficial to society at some point, I think that the disadvantages of having

robots

outweigh the advantages, because the interaction in person brings the connection between individuals and emotional support, leading to the

overall

well-being of society.

Submitted by innakireeva0101 on Fri Jan 05 2024

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Coherence Cohesion

To improve your score in coherence and cohesion, ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure. Your paragraph should have a clear central topic and subsequent sentences should build on that topic to deepen the analysis. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to show the relationships between ideas, and plan your paragraphs so that each one flows logically to the next.

Task Achievement

Your essay partially addresses all parts of the task. However, consider developing your ideas further to fully satisfy the requirements of the question. This includes exploring both sides of the argument more evenly and providing more detailed examples to support your points. Your conclusion could also be more comprehensive by summarizing the main reasons for your opinion.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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