In today's world people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

#world #people #smartphone

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In recent years, many citizens have had their own smartphones, which caused an argument

due to

Linking Words

their usage.

This

Linking Words

writer believes that the benefits of searching for information and forming relationships between

people

Use synonyms

outweigh the disadvantages relating to health. First of all, owning a

smartphone

Use synonyms

can aid

people

Use synonyms

, especially students, in finding information and knowledge.

Due to

Linking Words

its finding speed and vast data, students will be able to select the necessary statistics

as well as

Linking Words

search for related subjects without wasting time.

Instead

Linking Words

of looking up dictionaries, books and documents,

people

Use synonyms

only need to get their phones and type their subjects on the search bar.

As a result

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

method will help

people

Use synonyms

to save their time and energy in order to complete tasks faster. Another benefit of owning a

smartphone

Use synonyms

is the connection between users and communities. Having a

smartphone

Use synonyms

, individuals can keep in touch with their families and acquaintances, even though they are in different areas, even in other countries.

In addition

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

can make new friends all over the world only by using their phones. Taking Zalo as an example, it helps members of a family to connect to each other despite being far away.

However

Linking Words

, many individuals argue that using a

smartphone

Use synonyms

can lead to numerous problems,

such

Linking Words

as weakened immunity and anxiety.

This

Linking Words

statement can be true, but only if

people

Use synonyms

spend lots of time on their phones. For those who only use them if necessary, those gadgets will be a great support for their work and lives. Taking all into consideration, the benefits of owning a

smartphone

Use synonyms

outweigh the disadvantages of health problems because of its vast sources of information and connection.

Hence

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

should take advantage of smartphones as much as possible, but not overuse them.

Mon Jan 08 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Clarify the position in the introduction by directly addressing the topic. State if the advantages outweigh the disadvantages without ambiguity.

task achievement

Develop arguments with specific examples. Your essay has general statements but lacks concrete, illustrative examples that add depth to your arguments.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea with examples and explanations to support it. Each paragraph should contribute to your overall position.

coherence and cohesion

Use a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing effectively to aid with the essay's structure and flow. The logical sequencing of ideas is fine; however, more variety in cohesive devices can lead to a higher band.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

293 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

instant access
real-time updates
portable offices
emergency services
social media
navigation
cybersecurity
screen time
digital detox
environmental footprint

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
In many countries government spend a lot of money on arts. However, some think government should spend more on health and education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is true that authorities in some nations are spending a lot of money on promoting Arts whereas others belief that Goverenment should spend it on health care and on educational sector. I agree with this notion that these sectors helps to lead a stronger and educated workforce for the betterment of the society but arts have their own importance.
6.5
band
Some people think all lawbreakers should be sent to prison, while others think there are better alternatives for those whose crimes are minor, such as making them do work for the local community. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some individuals argue that all criminals should be sent to prison, while others believe that there are better alternatives, especially for minor offences. This essay will explore both viewpoints, and I will share my personal stance.
6
band
Some people say that museums should be free, whereas others find that some entry fee should be there. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Some individuals believe that there should be some charges for entrance to museums, while others argue that there should be free access to museums without any fees. Although having free access to museums can encourage more visitors, I believe that institutions which charge fees provide them with a necessary and steady source of income, enabling them to maintain and improve their collections and facilities.
4
band
Some people think that doctors and professors, must be required to work in the area where they did their education. Others believe they can have opportunities to work in any place if they want. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Some group of people are debating about which is the most suitable place for those who are working as a professional job. Some of them agree on working in a freedom area, and in the opposite way is to work in the place that the professor graduated. The essay will demonstrate both benefit sides of the two different places.
4
band
It is common aspiration among many young peopleto run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?
Many youngsters these days are inspired to run business instead of working for some organisation. In my opinion, it is a good strategy because benefits of running their own company have statistically overcome common practive of 9-5 jobs. I am going to discuss in detail and give some reasoning on how self employed services have more pros than cons.

In today's world people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries government spend a lot of money on arts. However, some think government should spend more on health and education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think all lawbreakers should be sent to prison, while others think there are better alternatives for those whose crimes are minor, such as making them do work for the local community. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that museums should be free, whereas others find that some entry fee should be there. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that doctors and professors, must be required to work in the area where they did their education. Others believe they can have opportunities to work in any place if they want. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is common aspiration among many young peopleto run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?