Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree of disagree? Write at least 250 words.
Nowadays the
food
and drink being consumed contain too much sugar which leads to multiple health issues. Some Use synonyms
people
argue that we should increase the price of sugary Use synonyms
items
to help Use synonyms
people
eat less sugar. I agree to some extent with the statement.
Increasing the price of sugary Use synonyms
items
discourages Use synonyms
people
from buying them. Use synonyms
This
is because of the current climate where Linking Words
people
prefer to spend money on products that are cost-effective and cost-saving. Use synonyms
For instance
, in the UK, Linking Words
due to
current austerity measures, Linking Words
people
are increasingly choosing to spend money on Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
items
that are cheaper rather than expensive. If sugary products are made more expensive, Use synonyms
people
will be naturally discouraged from buying them. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, introducing high prices for sugary goods will Linking Words
also
reduce the multiple health problems associated with their consumption.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, some Linking Words
people
argue that they will not be stopped from buying unhealthy snacks Use synonyms
due to
their freedom and free will. Linking Words
This
is because Linking Words
people
would continue to buy the Use synonyms
items
even though they have been made expensive. To illustrate Use synonyms
this
, Scandinavian countries Linking Words
such
as Norway, Sweden, Iceland and Denmark abandoned policies to increase the prices of sugary products Linking Words
due to
lack of acceptance from their citizens. Linking Words
Furthermore
, they argued that they would continue to buy unhealthy Linking Words
food
and beverages because their freedom to choose is paramount.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, I believe that Linking Words
food
and beverages that contain high levels of sugar should be increased, but Use synonyms
people
’s freedom and choices should be taken into consideration.Use synonyms
Submitted by mraha409 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task prompt and maintains focus throughout. However, ensure that all main points are fully supported with detailed examples or explanations.
coherence cohesion
While your essay follows a logical structure and is easy to follow, improving the linking between ideas in some paragraphs will enhance coherence. Using a wider variety of cohesive devices will add depth to your writing.
task achievement
Consider expanding on counterarguments and balancing them with your own views more precisely to provide a fuller response to the prompt.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a well-structured essay with clear introduction and conclusion paragraphs, which makes it easier to understand your argument.
task achievement
Your use of real-world examples, such as the example from Scandinavian countries, adds credibility to your argument and engages the reader.
task achievement
Your ideas are generally clear and comprehensive, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.