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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Computers are being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

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In recent times,
computers
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 have
an
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had an
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 upward trend in the education society .
While
Linking Words
 it makes learning more accessible and flexible for everyone, it does have drawbacks to be taken into account.
To begin
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 with,
first
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the first
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 and foremost benefit is that the presence of
computers
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 enhanced the accessibility of learning. They provide a large storage of information and educational resources.
Second,
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computers
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offers
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offer
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 flexibility for distance learning. Online
platform
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platforms
show examples
 and e-learning powered by
computers
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 allow individuals to study at their own pace and
convinience
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convenience
.
For example
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 in 2020 because of the pandemic. Educational institutions shifted to online learning
platform
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platforms
show examples
, where all the materials
such
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 as recorded lectures, resources and
assignment
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assignments
show examples
 of the courses are provided.
This
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 ensured the continuity in education despite the social distancing regulations.
On the other hand
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, one problem when people especially
students
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 use
computers
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 to study is that they tend to get easily distracted when they are learning. The games on the computer and
also
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 sudden pop-up notifications will enable them to lose their focus. Another possible issue is that the price of
computers
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are
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is
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 expensive and many
students
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 can not afford
it
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them
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. Because of
this
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, they
lack
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fall
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 behind in their studies as compared to fellow
students
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.
For instance
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,
students
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 without
computers
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 will have some difficulties participating in virtual classrooms and engaging in online discussions, potentially leading to isolation and a lack of interaction with peers. In conclusion,
while
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 children can benefit from the information and the flexibility, it can
also
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 lead to financial issues and another form of
distractment
Correct your spelling
distraction
distracted
 that can hinder study.

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introduction conclusion presence
Ensure introduction explicitly outlines the topic and previews the main points. Conclusions should effectively summarize the arguments without introducing new ideas.
logical structure
Work on creating logical paragraphs with clear main ideas supported by examples. Avoid overly complex structures that can confuse the reader.
supported main points
Use transitional phrases to seamlessly connect ideas and paragraphs. Cohesion refers to the flow of the essay, which can be disrupted by abrupt jumps between points.
complete response
Address both the advantages and disadvantages thoroughly, ensuring there is a balance of detail for both sides of the argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify your main ideas by giving precise examples and clear explanations. Each paragraph should convey a single clear message.
relevant specific examples
Include specific examples to illustrate the points raised. General statements need to be exemplified for a stronger argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Interactive learning tools
  • 2. Multimedia presentations
  • 3. Online resources
  • 4. Distance learning
  • 5. Remote areas
  • 6. Digital literacy
  • 7. Problem-solving
  • 8. Critical thinking
  • 9. Technology-driven world
  • 10. Digital textbooks
  • 11. Administrative tasks
  • 12. Cost-effective
  • 13. Distraction
  • 14. Social media
  • 15. Over-reliance
  • 16. Traditional skills
  • 17. Handwriting
  • 18. Face-to-face communication
  • 19. Technical problems
  • 20. Digital divide
  • 21. Inequality
  • 22. Educational opportunities
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