Humans are responsible for a variety of environmental problems, but can also take steps in order to reduce the damage caused to the plandlet. This essay will discuss environmental problems, the role of government and individual in addressing this issue affecting the planet.
Our earth is getting older and as humans do, its degeneration is merely inevitable. Humans, as the only living things on
this
planet who are gifted with logical thinking, are also
the ones responsible for taking care of it
. Meanwhile, Correct pronoun usage
them
people
and their humane traits to take and harvest from this
planet are sometimes cruel. We tend to forget to give back to Mother Nature.
Global warming, some may propose that it will happen eventually anyway. That being said, our irresponsible action may accelerate its process. For instance
, deforestation, a lot of folks know that it comes with adverse effects, immediately or far in the future. The direct effect is smoke, as in what happened in Kepulauan Riau, Sumatra back in 2015. That is
the horror created by inhumane people
driven only by greed.
Lumpur Lapindo is another frightening tale begun by human error. Started by a sloppy miner and careless leader who underestimates the dangerous side of doing the wrong thing to the environment. They did not do a thorough preparation before their work. Hence
, Mother Nature wanted to take back what they tried to take.
Thus
, for our children and children's children, we need to make a change. As individuals, small actions are never too small. We can undo the wrongs and slow the process of our earth's retirement. This
can be done by doing simple things such
as:
wise use of energy, using fewer plastics, or better yet moving to reusable tools Remove the comma
apply
instead
, separating our trash, making our surroundings greener, and so on.
All things considered, these small deeds may feel hard to bear when we do it alone. It can feel frustrating as we feel that it will not bring any transformation because we do it only by ourselves. Therefore
, we need the support of our government. If we want to make a great change, we must take others with us. The burden is that sometimes other people
do not understand the importance of it. This
is where the stakeholders step in. By raising the awareness of our current environmental situation. And also
, if needed, giving the people
written rules complete with clear and intolerable punishment for those who did harm to our surroundings.Submitted by aghnia.ulhaq on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position throughout the response; however, the argument could be further strengthened by providing more specific evidence and examples relevant to the points made. Develop your points more fully to fall in line with IELTS standards for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The essay has evidence of logical sequencing with some clear progression of ideas, but the structure could be improved by clearer topic sentences and more varied connecting words. Paragraphing is employed but not always effectively; ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that transitions are smooth for a better score in coherence and cohesion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!